A Day in the Life of a Busy Stay at Home Mom & Spread the Kindness Link Up On the Edge #825
We are two weeks into the new school year and I feel quite like a chicken with its head cut off. Running around in a frenzy all the time, trying to keep the schedules of four people in order and get everyone where they need to be on time. Mom’s Uber service runs 24/7 it seems…however, Dad’s Uber service takes over after dark. My old eyes play wicked tricks on me in the darkness which makes me feel very unsafe if I have to drive by the illumination of headlights and street lamps.
My younger child likes to quip that while he’s at school all I do is sit on the couch and watch television. Ha, freaking, ha, kid. So I’m going to use this post to set the record straight for this sweet sassy ass child of mine.
The Morning Hours…
With a 4:15 alarm set for every weekday morning, my bladder usually alerts me around 3:45 a.m. that wake up time is near. I try to ignore the initial bladder alarm, but I’m usually only successful for about 15 minutes. So I slowly drag my tired perimenopausal body out of the comfort of my bed and make my way downstairs, being careful not to trip over one of our feline babies swarming my feet as I descend the stairs.
First I turn on the coffee maker, then I feed the cats. They are like four little furry scavengers acting like they haven’t eaten in days, mewing at me and getting under my feet even more. Then I go the bathroom and brush my teeth while the coffee brews and I wait for Jeff to join me. He sleeps straight up until the 4:15 alarm wakes him. By the time he gets downstairs, I’m finished in the bathroom and either sitting on the couch with my coffee in hand or laying out the yoga mats for a good morning stretch.
On yoga days, we are on the mats by 4:35 and finished by 5:00. We try to do yoga at least 5 days a week but we’ve definitely been slacking these last few weeks as we make the transition to the school schedule. At 5:30, I make my way back upstairs, gently give the children their first wake up notice, and get in the shower. After my shower, I promptly put on makeup, fix my hair, and get dressed for the day. This usually takes me until 6:00 which is the time for the children’s second wake up nudge.
After a few minutes of cat snuggles, Ralph gets up without much issue as Jeff begins making his way upstairs to get ready for work. Archie lays in bed until about 6:15 or 6:20, at which point I have to start yelling at him to get the heck out of bed. His response is always a very tired whine of, “I know, Mom. I’m getting there.”
By 6:30, everyone is dressed and downstairs eating breakfast. Jeff and I tend to split the breakfast making depending on who is downstairs first. Both kids have a plethora of breakfast choices, both hot and cold, made to order.
Jeff leaves for work at 6:45 and I continue on with morning chores, packing a lunch for Archie (Ralph prefers school lunch), and constantly reminding my kids of the time. At 7:00, the children brush their teeth and hair, put on their shoes, pack their bags, and we are in the car between 7:07-7:13. The drive to school takes approximately 3 minutes so they arrive with time to spare for the 7:25 bell. They need to be in homeroom/first period by 7:30.
The Morning Hours Continued…
Depending on the day, I either head back home to finish the morning chores (dishes, laundry, cat boxes, etc.) or I drive straight to Walmart to do some early morning grocery shopping before hoards of people overwhelm that place. If you’ve ever gone to Walmart after about 10:00 in the morning then you know the chaos. My nerves can’t take that many people crashing into me as I turn the corner into each aisle, but I find that the early morning shopping hours are quite pleasant. Most employees on duty that early look to be elderly part-retired folks and they are generally very pleasant and welcoming. It always makes me giggle when a young person is working the early morning shift at Walmart because 9 out of 10 times they are utterly miserable. Early morning is definitely an old person preference! The kids don’t like it so much.
If I’ve gone grocery shopping, then of course I have to put it all away when I get home. If I’ve not gone shopping, then I generally spend an hour or two on my laptop doing bloggy things. By about 11:00, I’m starting to feel hungry so that’s when I take a break. I make some food and then I sit on the couch in front of the television for the duration of one episode of whatever show I’m currently watching. Right now that show is The Crown but will soon be American Idol and The Voice. I try to give myself a whole hour to just sit and chill…which takes me right to the afternoon.
The Afternoon and Evening
Afternoons are varied. About 3 to 4 days a week, I spend a large portion of my day in the kitchen prepping food. It doesn’t seem to matter how much I make, the leftovers disappear within 24-48 hours, sending me straight back to the kitchen. I don’t mind it though. I love cooking and feeding people is my love language. Anyone who has ever come to my house knows this…if you leave here hungry, that is 100% your own fault!
The afternoons seem to fly by the quickest. School is dismissed at 2:25. Right now Ralph is in football season so he stays for practice from 2:30-5:00. He’ll go right into swim season after that and then he’ll have a long break before track season starts. During that long break, he stays after school almost every day with his Gifted and Talented teacher to work on special projects. Archie works 3 days a week (and one weekend day) at the hardware store directly across the street from his school. On work days, I meet him at 2:30 in the parking lot of the hardware store with his work clothes and a bag of snacks and we chat about his day for a few minutes before he starts work at 3:00. The other days, I meet him at 2:30 in front of the school to bring him home where he eats something, changes into his workout clothes, and then I drive him to the gym. If his gym time lines up with when Jeff leaves work (around 3:45), Jeff will meet him at the gym, work out with him, and bring him home. When Jeff can’t, then I head back to the gym to pick him up, come home for a few minutes, and then head back out to pick up Ralph from practice.
On Archie’s work days, I’m back home by about 2:45 and usually have some abandoned food prep that I return to. At 4:45, it’s time to go pick up Ralph from practice. I bring him home, feed him, and then head back out at 5:45 to pick up Archie when he finishes work at 6:00. Jeff will do the evening pick ups when he can, but next week he starts teaching an evening class for his union from 6:00-9:00 every Tuesday night and from 9:00-5:00 one Saturday a month. The union hall is hour from our house so those are really long days for him.
Once I have all of my people safely at home with me, I turn off my cell phone ringer, I smoke some weed to decompress, and I feed anyone who hasn’t eaten yet or needs to eat more. It sure seems like teenage boys eat all the time. On a regular night (one without a football game or some other sporting event or band concert), I try to have my butt on the couch by 7:00, but lately it’s been closer to 8:00, where I promptly doze off while Jeff and I watch the evening news (recorded because we never get to the couch in time to watch it live). Sometime around 8:30-9:00, I head to bed in the hopes of getting a solid 6-7 hours of sleep. However, that rarely happens and the best I usually get is 6-7 hours of very interrupted and restless sleep. And then I begin the whole process again at 3:45 the next morning.
This doesn’t even account for appointments when I have to pick kids up from school and return them to school, or when a kid gets sick at school, or when they forget something that I have to drop off at school, or when I volunteer to help at school.
Although it’s chaotic and I often feel like that headless chicken I mentioned above, I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I mean, boredom isn’t really great for humanity anyway. I always say if we aren’t busy doing, then we’re probably busy dying. So I’d rather being doing all the things!
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What do your days look like?
Keeping it on the edge,
Shelbee
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.
30 Comments
Rena
Whoa, you are indeed a busy mom. Enjoy it, though, as the days are fleeting. Thanks for sharing your schedule and for hosting. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.
Rena
https://finewhateverblog.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Rena, thanks so much, my friend. These days truly are fleeting! I’m not ready for the kids to fly the coop yet!
xoxo
Shelbee
Nancy
Oh my, you are so busy with it all! It’s totally different here in the Netherlands. Here most families work both, and the kids have to go everywhere they need to go on their bicycles. Your kids will definitely look back at a very very good childhood in a very very good family!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Oh my gosh, Nancy, thank you so much, my drear friend. I think my kids already know how good they have it! Have a great weekend and I’ll talk to you on Monday.
xoxo
Shelbee
Amy Johnson
It always cracks me up how kids or “working” adults think a stay-at-a-home mom is so easy. I remember those chauferring days except we live an hour away from everything, so i spent hours a day in a car. It was horrible. I was glad when that ended. My day sounds very similar to yours except I also have a huge vegetable and perennial garden to tend too. And I also have cats that wake me up at 4:00 am everyday acting like they have eaten in days. Why 4:00 am????
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Oh my gosh, Amy, this just made me giggle! Cats are some of the funniest creatures ever! My cat just tried to yank the straw out of my iced coffee and knocked the cup over, spilling it everywhere. Then when I jumped up to quickly clean it, I smashed my toe on the ottoman. Darn cats! I never realized how much time tending a garden takes until my sister explained it to me. I am not a gardener at all. With the combination of my poor skills and the climate where I live, I’ve managed to grow one head of lettuce in the 13 years I’ve lived here! LOL Granted, I didn’t try 13 times, but I did try to have a garden maybe 3 or 4 times and only one very expensive head of lettuce was my result. Hahaha. I hope you have a lovely weekend, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Steph@CrazyLittleLovebirds
Shelbee, I can totally relate to those busy days! Wishing you a lovely weekend with your family. As always, thank you for hosting this wonderful linkup; it is always appreciated.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Steph! I hope you have a relaxing and wonderful weekend as well!
xoxo
Shelbee
Aletha Oglesby
Wow, I remember those days. Now, I wonder how I did it. I don’t remember feeling excessively busy; it just felt normal. Now I still manage to fill my days but sometimes I miss the adventure of kids. That’s why God gives us grandkids! Thanks for the chance to link-up.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
It’s funny you say that, Aletha. Most days don’t feel chaotically busy…they’re just regular days where I’m performing regular mom duties. But sometimes when I look at my daily calendar, I can get a bit overwhelmed by all the stuff that I have to do in a day. I don’t really know how any of us do it all…we just do it because it needs to be done! I will definitely embrace grandparenthood when that time arrives!
xoxo
Shelbee
Laura Bambrick
Wow, your days are packed! I can definitely relate to feeling like “Mom’s Uber,” especially once school and activities start up again. I love that you still make time for that hour to sit, eat, and watch a show—it sounds very well deserved!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks, Laura! I knew you would understand the chaotic schedule with kids involved in all sorts of activities. As parents, we just continue to do it all with love in our hearts and a smile on our faces! What blessings we have.
xoxo
Shelbee
Joanne
Yep, that all sounds about right! Even this year with 2 boys off to college and the other working full time for himself I thought I was going to have so much more time to myself… and I kind of do but the housework and groceries still need doing, food still needs cooking, bills still have to be paid, etc.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I knew you would relate to this post, Joanne! I’m glad that the kids don’t stop needing us even after they leave the house!
xoxo
Shelbee
Melynda
I loved my stay at home years! It looks like you enjoy yours as well, and that busy is a good thing! Have a great week ahead and thanks for hosting.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks, Melynda! I really do enjoy it. I embrace dedicating my life to the service of my family. But I also share that love, care, and nurturing with all of our friends as well. I am truly blessed and so appreciative of this beautiful life. Have a wonderful weekend, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Di
Oh Shelbee, what a whirlwind! I hope this makes your son realize how very busy you are, and how well you nurture and care for your family! Thanks for sharing your schedule, and thanks so much for the favorite from last week. Hope you enjoy a quiet weekend!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, thanks so much, Di! I really appreciate that. My children like to give me a hard time at home, but according to their teachers, they both really do know and appreciate all that I do for them and how great they have it around here! I hope you have a lovely weekend as well, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Gail Is This Mutton
I’m exhausted reading this. Kudos for getting up at 4.15 and then doing yoga! Very impressive.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Lol, thanks so much, Gail! We have slacked on yoga the past few weeks and my body is screaming at me! We’ll be back at it tomorrow morning for sure. Have a lovely weekend, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
mireille
I often feel like my kids think I stay home and sit on the couch and eat bonbons. But lately with having to help more with my parents, I find myself pretty wiped out mentally and sometimes physically. I do take time during the day to read/work on a puzzle/blog so I can decompress.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Oh my goodness, Mireille, why do our children think these things?! I remember some years back I was cleaning out the trash bags from all the small garbage cans in bathrooms and bedrooms and one of my kids said something like, “Oh you clean those out?” I was like, “Um…did you think these tiny trash cans were bottomless?” LOL Being a caregiver on any level is completely exhausting. I’m glad that you are able to take some time for yourself during the day to decompress. I love my crossword books for decompressing (and for brain exercising). I hope you have a relaxing weekend, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Your True Self
Hi, Shelbee – I can relate. When I was driving my children everywhere, I finally decided I was only going to go one place a day and I’ve been that way ever since. It’s so irritating when the body insists on going to the bathroom just before we’re done sleeping. You made me laugh, because my husband calls it “doing my bloggy things” when I am spending time on the blog. Oh, and my Dad always nagged me to wake up in the mornings for school. I’ve never been a morning person so it’s hard for me to get up so early like you do. My son is like me. He would sleep right through his boombox blaring next to his ear as his alarm clock, even though it was shaking the whole house! We all manage to do what we need to do, though, when we grow up and have jobs to do. This post was a great slice of life. Thanks for sharing – Angie, http://www.yourtrueselfblog.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aww, thanks so much, Angie! Oh my goodness, at this perimenopausal stage, my body is doing all sorts of things to annoy me! I just giggled about the “bloggy things”! That’s what we are doing on our computers…bloggy things! Maybe we’re writing, maybe we’re editing photos, maybe we’re answering comments, or commenting on other blogs…you know, all the bloggy things! (My computer keeps autocorrecting “bloggy things” to “bloody things” which kind of works, too. Hahahahaha) I’ve always been an early morning person ever since I started 5:00 a.m. swim practices when I was 12. If I sleep past 6:30 I feel like I’ve lost half the day. I hope you have a wonderful weekend and can sleep in all you want!
xoxo
Shelbee
nicole orriens
I loved reading about your day, and I’m impressed by how early you get up. I was pleasantly surprised the drive to school is only 3 minutes which makes me wonder: can they go their by bike? Or is that too dangerous?
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Nicole! My kids have never been bike riders, but it’s close enough for them to walk to school. Since I’m home and can drive them, it saves them about 15 minutes in the morning routine. They are hard enough to get up in the morning so it’s worth my sanity to just drive them instead of forcing them to be ready 15 minutes earlier. Plus it’s usually still dark when they would have to leave to walk. But it’s not a dangerous area at all for walking. I’m just making it more convenient for my kids.
xoxo
Shelbee
LensUp
The 24/7 mom Uber line is real — September turns our kitchen table into a dispatch desk, and I’m signing papers I haven’t fully read between pickups. Two weeks in and I’m already behind on the school stuff, same as you.
This week’s chore was a school health form that had to go in as a scanned document, but the only copy I had was a clean PDF from the clinic. I ran it through LensUp to rough it up a bit — slight tilt, some paper grain, softer contrast — because the portal wouldn’t take a plainly digital file. The processing happens right in the browser tab and the files never get uploaded, which matters to me when my kids’ names are on the page. One honest note: when you pick a target size for the compression, it aims for that, but it can land a bit over.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much. I’m sure lots of parents can relate to the chaos of school time for the kids! But it’s all worth it in the end.
xoxo
Shelbee
Marsha Banks
You get up early!!! I have just been asleep for a couple of hours at that time! Good on you and Jeff for exercising together. Mike and I used to “Walk Away the Pounds” together. Now that we don’t have a basement, we would do it out in the garage. Of course, he can’t do that right now, but I should be! I love how you and your boys still communicate so much. When mine were that age, I was teaching, and we just didn’t have the time in the mornings. But, we’d talk a lot if I had to drive them somewhere in the evenings. I kinda miss that…except for the driving in the dark thing. It’s funny because I never understood it when others would say it. Unfortunately, I totally get it now! I think I just hit my stride about the time you’re going to sleep! Anyway, thanks so much for the feature and the link up this week!
https://marshainthemiddle.com/
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, my friend. Jeff and I tried walking the pounds away together too but our schedules just aren’t permitting that right now. And soon the weather will forbid it as well! Oh my gosh, the driving in the dark thing hits close to home! I cannot do it. In fact, I won’t drive in the dark anymore unless it’s literally within a few blocks of my house. I am not safe driving at night. I really cannot see properly. No one believes me how bad it is. Even my eye doctor told me that I can see better in the dark than I think I can. Say what?! Still not driving in the dark. I hope you have a wonderful week ahead!
xoxo
Shelbee