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Today, I Wept
Today, I wept. This morning, my college swim coach shared the news of this story on our team’s alumni Facebook page. He shared it because the husband and father of the victims was a member of our team and a member of my graduating class. And while I have not “known” him in 20 plus years, today my heart broke for him. I quickly shared the Go Fund Me Fundraiser on my Facebook page because in that moment I wasn’t really sure what else to do. A few hours later as I was walking to pick up my youngest son from preschool, I was lost deep in thought wondering what…
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Shelbee Says…”Stay confident and strong in the truth of who you are.”
“Dear Shelbee, When I return to school in the fall, I will be returning as a transgender male. All of my classmates will have known me through eighth grade as a girl. I was home schooled this past year. When I return to school I know there will be many who will be giving me a very hard time about the change. I am sure there will be some teasing and bullying. What is the best course of action for me to take to deal with this? Do I fight back, ignore, or come up with something to quiet their taunts?” -Transitioning with Trepidation How to Handle School Bullies while…
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Beautiful Train Wrecks & Link Up On the Edge #97
As the fashion world is grieving the recent loss of the beautiful Kate Spade, I wanted to take a moment to pay tribute to her and send my condolences to all of her friends and family. I also wanted to take this opportunity to once again open the discussion on the topic of mental illness, specifically Bipolar Disorder and Depression. It is a serious issue and one that is very close to my heart. It shows no mercy and it does not discriminate based on race, religion, gender, or status. And it takes lives. Every day. Wonderful, amazing, exquisite, rich lives. Lives that for some reason feel dark and tortured…
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Shelbee Says…”The only choice you have is to survive…or don’t.”
The last few weeks have been somewhat of a roller coaster of emotions for me due to some recent unravellings in my personal life. And while I am slowly adjusting to a new normal, it got me to thinking about all the shit that I have been through in my life and how I have made it this far completely in tact and stronger than ever. Since I don’t have a reader question to answer, I am using this opportunity to share my own words of advice that I have to remind myself of when times get really rough. I have talked in the past about the choices that we…
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Shelbee Says…”Losing a pet is like losing a family member.”
“Dear Shelbee, Our dog has recently become very ill and we have to put him down soon as he is suffering a lot. I cannot write much as I am suffering a lot as well. I consider him to be a son to me. I understand he is not human but I have had him since he was a baby. He is now a little more than 2 years old and I love him more than everything. I am trying to make his last days as happy as possible. What else can I do?…I have lost grandfathers and also a friend to cancer, but this loss is unbearable. Some people…
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When You Realize Your Strength is a Weakness
When you possess a quality inherent in your personality that has been viewed by many as a strength for your entire life and you wake up one day and realize that is was an extraordinary weakness that has broken your entire sense of reality, it can rattle you right to your core. This is what I have been dealing with this past week and the reason I have been quite absent from my blog and social media. It takes a lot of internal processing to figure out what exactly to do with it all. I had to bring into question my entire sense of self and a large part of…
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Shelbee Says…Recognizing the Dangers of Spring Mania
Recognizing the Dangers of Spring Mania *Originally printed in the Spring Issue of Resilientista Magazine. Did you know that approximately 51 million people worldwide suffer from Bipolar Disorder? With a population that large, surely almost everyone knows someone with a Bipolar diagnosis. If you do not suffer personally, it could be a co-worker, a relative, a friend, or even your spouse. Living with Bipolar Disorder, whether you suffer from it yourself or someone close to you does, presents a unique set of challenges with the changing of the seasons. Many people, even those not afflicted with an official diagnosis of mental illness, are familiar with seasonal affective disorder, a change…
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Shelbee Says…”Do the Work”
“Dear Shelbee, I had been talking to a counselor about various issues in my life but I had to stop going because I was tired of the constant questioning of everything I do and feel. Everything wrong in my life is not all my fault. I get that I am responsible for my own behaviors, but there are other people to blame as well. What is the purpose of counseling if all it does it place blame on me? Nothing gets fixed that way. -Not to Blame” Dear Not to Blame, Life issues are not really a matter of blame at all. Life issues are just that…issues that we all…
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Feel the Love & #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #67
I am without outfit photos and without a photographer this week so I had to resort to the old tripod and remote method which never, ever results in the same quality photos for some reason. Plus I can never get quite as comfortable as I do when I have someone on the other side of the camera making me smile and laugh. My, how things have changed from the beginning of my blog when I was only comfortable taking selfies. But I am choosing to ignore the poor quality of my photos and focus on the fact that I am channeling and feeling the love these days. All the love.…
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Shelbee Says… “Communication is the responsibility of both parties.”
“Dear Shelbee, my spouse and I seem to communicate better through text messaging than through face to face conversations. It seems that face to face conversations always end up in an argument, but when texting we can reveal our true thoughts and feelings more easily and express our frustrations without getting snippy with each other. How can we transition to smoother face to face conversations without arguing?” -I’d Rather Be Texting Dear Rather Be Texting, Communication is a rather tricky concept when you really think about it. The way we communicate with one another as humans is distinctly unique from the way communication happens among any other animal species on…
