Guest Post: Bueller? Bueller? & #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #94

October 23, 2018 / 42 Comments

 

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  • Note from Shelbee: If you read last Tuesday’s post, What to Wear to a Nude Beach, then you are already familiar with today’s guest blogger, my friend and avid blog reader, Susan Marinelli. Susan is at it again with her wit and humor taking on today’s fashions in the world of high school kids.  I cannot thank Susan enough for helping me out with some blog content while I am floundering through the crazy, mirky waters of what my life is right now!  It’s all about being kind and helping others simply because we can!  Keep spreading your kindness, my friends!

Hi, I am Susan Marinelli. I am an aged hippie from New Castle, Delaware, a very old town on the Delaware River. I live in my old, old house with my aged Scottie, Wally, and a most annoying cat named Gracie. My grandparents lived around the corner, where my father was born, and I am related to 99% of all the Italians in my town. I am inching toward retirement, and in the meantime, drive a school bus and a senior center bus so I don’t have to work in an office. I’ve done a lot of traveling, love to read, cook, garden, and am a fan of history and language. And of course, fashion. Here I am (and yes, I am holding an Italian flag).

Susan Marinelli (left), Guest Blogger

Bueller? Bueller?

by Susan Marinelli

Oh, High School! Those halcyon days! We were young, we were thin, we were free, and our parents paid our bills. Adolescence is a time to find yourself, experiment, and figure out the person you want to be.  Teachers can solve a personal problem in half an hour and universal acceptance is the norm.  At least in the movies.

I don’t know about the rest of you, but my high school experience was quite the opposite.  

I was pimply, with ginormous boobs, a tragic shag haircut, and low self esteem.  I couldn’t wait to get out of there!

One thing that hasn’t changed about high school throughout the generations is the daily fashion parade.  

My current job requires that I return daily to the scene of my own fashion crimes.  

It requires that I watch the fashion parade, at length, ad infinitum, ad nauseum. Ad-libbing is just a bonus.  I sit in my seat whilst 2,500 teenagers parade past me on the way to their respective school busses, cars, parent’s cars, motorcycles, bicycles, etc.  

And believe me, I am a captive audience in more ways than one. It is the favorite part of my job!

I don’t take pictures of kids for obvious reasons. Usually, I content myself with texting vivid and judgmental descriptions to my BFF Joanie, who attended this high school with me, and committed many a good fashion faux pas herself. Think rabbit fur coat that shed clumps during the school day. Body suits in 90 degree heat.  Or my blonde phase which involved a bottle of Sun-In turning my hair bright orange.  You get the idea.  We’ve all been there.  

And look how well we turned out!

Fashion is a learning curve that takes time, money, and patience.  These kids are beginners.  Many of them just got to pick out their own clothing this year.  It is only natural they will pick some hoot-worthy clothes and I wish them the best.  Truly, I do.

They are just now learning they will be judged by what they wear.  They have my sympathy, my empathy, and my well wishes.  If they wanted it, they could have my guidance, too.  

They also have my most appreciative derision.  

You, gentle reader, get to share in this experience with me, as Shelbee has agreed to share my writing with you.  Like the flu, I hope it’s contagious.

Have you ever sat with a straight face while a kid dressed as Keanu Reeves straight out of the Matrix asks where bus 27 is? He wears all black: black trench coat, baggy black jeans, black combat boots, and some sort of black shirt that I have never seen because it is always hidden beneath the trench.  Even his phone is black.  He wears this outfit every single day, whether the weather is blisteringly hot or frigid and snowy.  I admire his commitment.  

Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash

Then we have Pat. Pat is addicted to plaid. It is worn daily either above or below, unless its substitute, camouflage, is worn. Pat has platinum hair, with roots, which I am told is now called balayage.  Pat has the most fabulous, hilarious, multitudinous collection of platform sneakers on earth, or at least in this county. I have never seen the same shoes worn twice. Every shoe is pristine. Truly it is amazing! Dad must own a shoe store.  

 If you are wondering why I’ve stopped using pronouns, it is because this child has androgyny down PAT!  

Photo by Pablo Charnas on Unsplash
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This is not the kid who spends every morning Liberty-spiking his hair, this is some other kid I got off the Internet.  Share with me the mental picture of the kid I actually saw though, with this exact hair, caught in the rain, while his spikes flop to one side or the other, and the hair paint drips down his face.  Even he had to laugh.

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And the reason I cannot get a Blondie Tee is because every single high school kid is sporting one, the little snots!  They weren’t even born then! 

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But in the spirit of shopping mojo, here is what the kids are wearing in my local high school.

1) Graphic Tees

The biggest trends in tees this year are California Republic (with the requisite picture of the bear on it), NASA, Marilyn Monroe, Blondie, and any shirt that says New York or any of its boroughs on it. And let’s not forget any band shirt as long as it looks old.  The smartass tees continue in popularity, particularly anything relating to sarcasm, not caring, marijuana, and anime.  Solid color tees without a saying or a picture are simply not seen in high school unless they are worn by teachers.  Or bus drivers.

2) Cell Phones

This could be a post unto itself.  And if you encourage me, will be.

3) Headphones (see number two)
4) Adidas Slides

 The Adidas website says this:

“The Adilette debuted in 1972 as a poolside slide, and it’s been a style mainstay of Adidas ever since.” 

Clearly.  These slides are ubiquitous.  To compound the horror, these are now worn with socks.  Preferably patterned and mismatched.  

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5) Boys Wearing Pink

Naturally the boys want to Save the TaTas.  God bless their breast cancer supporting little hearts.  

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6) Destructed Denim

This is the Kardashians of denim.  Ripped, patched, torn, destructed, mini-cuffed, micro-cuffed…the mind reels. I even saw a destructed denim tube top.  Not kidding.

7) Camo

Pants, shorts, kimonos, jackets, sneakers, phone cases, purses, backpacks, socks. The place resembles an Army barracks. Worn predominantly with black although orange is a strong second and pink is in there, too.  Allow me to sniff haughtily: I wear a brown long sleeve tee with my camo skinnies.

8)  Red High Tops

A la Usher.  I am rushing off to order a pair.

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9)  Vans: Old Skool

Ubiquitous. Black. Suede.  

It annoys me they spell Skool incorrectly.  

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Thank you, Shelbee, for allowing me to opine on my bit of haute/not couture.  

Have a great week!

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And thank you, Susan, for writing for me! And now for the featured favorites from last week’s link up.

Laurie of Meditations in Motion shared her post, Especially Toward Those Who May Try Your Patience…because even the kindest souls get a little frustrated sometimes! I hear you, Laurie. On all of it…from the chicken pie to the correct pronunciation of Lancaster (well, because I know how to pronounce it) straight to the disgusting gum wall! Ugh. Preach it, sister.

By Laurie of Meditations in Motion

And if you are looking for ideas for Halloween costumes, do check out Tianna of Story Apothecary in her Pop Art Zombie Makeup Tutorial. So cool, Tianna! You are one talented girl, for sure.

Tianna of Storybook Apothecary


Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

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