4 Steps to Feeling Good in Your Own Skin & Living Your Best Life
Do you ever stand in front of the mirror, examining yourself with microscopic intensity, criticizing every wrinkle, every bulge, every little bit of extra that society has deemed unattractive?
I would guess that many of you will answer yes. Probably most of us have done this at least once in our lives. For me, it’s more like a monthly occurrence. Our relationships with ourselves can be one of the most complicated relationships we will ever have. We are our own worst critics while also having to be our own best advocates and cheerleaders. How we come to reconcile these two things is a very personal endeavor for each of us.
This practice of focusing on all the things about ourselves that we think are undesirable can and will perpetuate a negative effect on our self confidence and self worth. When it comes to the negative voices that speak to us in our heads, we have two choices. We can listen to them which will guarantee us a life of continual unhappiness with ourselves. Or we can take 4 simple steps to silence these inner voices as we make our way towards getting comfortable in our own skin and living our best lives.
*This is contributed content.
1. Remind yourself that our minds like to play games with us.
Too frequently, we look in the mirror or at a photograph of ourselves and our brain focuses on every little imperfection we can find. But we have to continue to remind ourselves that what we see is not necessarily what the world outside sees. Because the truth of the matter is this…we are all too worried about our own imperfections to focus on the imperfections of others. Sadly, most of us view ourselves with a much harsher and more judging eye than we do others.
But why do we do this? Shouldn’t we be as kind to ourselves as we are to strangers? Maintaining a mindset of negativity about yourself and your appearance can have long lasting effects on your confidence and self esteem. When we lack confidence and self esteem, it begins to take a toll on every aspect of our lives from our work to our relationships and everything else in between.
So the next time you look in the mirror and you hear that creepy little negative voice pointing out your imperfections, shut it down and refocus on your positive attributes. Do this every single time you look in the mirror or at a photograph of yourself and you will be surprised at how a new perspective can solve a very old problem.
2. Make positive lifestyle changes.
As we fall prey to the negative self-talk trap, sometimes the only way out is to actively make positive changes in your life. Has your skin lost its glow from stress and anxiety? Commit to drinking more water. Maybe change your skin care routine. Set a stricter sleep schedule and stick to it. Perhaps you are suffering with digestion issues or headaches? Investigate the effects of your diet and make changes where necessary. Perhaps consider adding a supplement like biocidin to promote microbial balance within your system. Whatever supplement your body might need, you can save even more with this Total Restore Coupon to help maintain optimal gut health. If you think you need a complete lifestyle makeover, then commit to it and start making the changes one small thing at a time.
There is no formula to follow. You know best what you need and you also know best what you can do without. The journey to finding comfort in your own skin is a very personal one and no single method will work for everyone. It really is a matter of trial and error, but the work is necessary to get to your best life.
3. Implement an exercise routine.
Physical exercise is by far one of the most important and most beneficial things that we can do for the health of our bodies. Don’t get me wrong, I hate exercise. Passionately. But I also understand the necessity of exercise. It releases all sorts of wonderful hormones into your system and can have an immediate effect on things like mood, digestion, and various aches and pains. Exercise will assist in weight loss as well as boost your energy levels and help sustain good mental health and equilibrium. You also might consider weight management supplements like Nucific Bio X4 to optimize your digestive system while assisting your progress towards a healthy weight.
But don’t forget the exercise. If you are like me and despise exercise, try something low impact like yoga or walking and build from there. It really only takes 3 weeks of repeated activity to form a habit. And once the habit is formed, it is smooth sailing after that right into the land of your best life.
Another way to motivate yourself into an exercise routine is by adding bright pieces to your workout wardrobe like vibrant leggings, funky sports bras, inspiring slogan tees, or booty scrunch workout leggings.
4. You’ve done the work, now enjoy the results.
As you are making your way to your best life, try not to view self care as a chore. We owe it to our bodies, to our minds, and to all the people who depend on us to thrive and be healthy. Use makeup and fashion as a way to recognize and highlight your healthy successes. Dress up and adorn yourself in celebration of this only vessel that you will ever get.
Be creative. Be unique. Be kind. But above all, be healthy. Without our health, we don’t really have much at all. But with our health, we can find the utmost comfort in our own skin.
How have you been treating yourself lately?
Keeping it on the edge,
Shelbee
Linking up with these Fabulous Link Parties.
Shop my look…
Outfit Details: Blazer-Thrifted / Hoodie-Torrid / Leggings-Old Navy / Sock-Sock Dreams / Boots-ShoeDazzle / Hat, Scarf, and Gloves-Target / Necklace and Earrings-Cato
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.
22 Comments
Rena
Wonderful reminders. Thank you for the pep talk.
Rena
http://www.finewhateverblog.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Rena! Have a great weekend!
xoxo
Shelbee
jess jannenga
Speaking of self care, I miss getting a pedi or my eyebrows threaded. ( yeah i know, first world problems!) but those little treats can mean something. These are great points, at times we are our own worst enemy as far as confidence. feelings of our body.. For 12 years I was just trying to get out of pain and would do a bit here and there due to my EDS. now I am off the strong meds and have been enjoying lifting weights and exercising again. I love your boots and those pink socks! You look cozy amist all the snow and stylish!
Have a great weekend!
jess xx
http://www.elegantlydressedadstylish.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, Jess, thanks so much! I think all of have those moments of low self esteem. I know I sure do, so any tips I can think of to help me, I figure they may help others, too. You are such an inspiration and I am so happy for you that you finally got off the strong medications and how fabulous that you are lifting weights! And I hear you about first world problems! Ha.
xoxo
Shelbee
Michelle
I love this outfit! Such lovely pops of color in the midst of winter!
And yes, you have to focus on your best attributes instead of those our inner critic wants us to focus on. Chances are you may not be able to change those – like no matter of diet or exercise is going to make me 5’8”. I’m never not going to be somewhat of curvy a girl. Even when I was 18, no one would mistake me for a buff athlete – and I tried. So you have to be happy with who you are. And for me? (And I know this is going to sound strange.) People who are kind, funny, empathetic genuinely look physically more attractive to me. I can’t explain it.
Michelle
https://mybijoulifeonline.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Michelle! I agree with you on all points! And I do not find it strange at all that kind, funny, empathetic people are more attractive to you. I am basically the same way so no need to explain. Inner beauty absolutely reflects strongly in our outer beauty and it is definitely more attractive than any kind of beauty that needs exercise or diet to accomplish!
xoxo
Shelbee
Mica
I love the colourful scarf and that’s a nice statement blazer too! these are good tips as well! It’s important to have regular healthy habits to help us be the best we can be 🙂
Hope you’ve had a nice weekend 🙂
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Mica! I definitely feel so much better overall when I am taking care of myself and my health. I just got this blazer at a thrift shop and I had left behind at first thinking I didn’t need another blazer. But then I couldn’t stop thinking about it and went back for it a week later. Thankfully it was still there! Have a great week, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Kathrine Eldridge
Thanks for these wonderful tips Shelbee! I have been struggling lately with lots of negative self talk. Thanks for the reminder that I need to listen to different voices. Sending peace and love my friend!
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Kathrine, I am so sorry to hear that the negative voices are getting to you, too. Sometimes it is so difficult to silence those voices, but I am trying really hard to edit the way I speak to myself! Being locked down like this for so long also doesn’t help because we have no opportunities to escape from ourselves for a bit with some healthy distractions. Sending love and peace right back to you, my friend! And in case you needed a little reminder: you are beautiful and inspiring and so very kind!
xoxo
Shelbee
Joanne
Love this! I have been working really hard the last few years to change so much about my physical appearance and overall health; eating better, working out more regularly, drinking more water. Of course the weight loss has helped me change my attitude about my appearance.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Joanne! I have only just started working really hard at implementing healthier lifestyle choices. It really does make me feel so much more comfortable in my own skin when I am paying attention to and caring for my body and my overall health. Keep up the good work, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Patrick Weseman
Looking so very nice. I love the words that you have written here. So very nice. I need to remember them.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Patrick! I hope my words can uplift and help at least a few people!
xoxo
Shelbee
Lisa notes
I definitely have too much negative self-talk going on in my head about how I look. Thanks for the reminder that I don’t have to listen to it; I can shut it down and refocus on the positive things!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Lisa, thanks so much for sharing your vulnerability with me. I just finished writing a post for tomorrow that elaborates a bit more on the idea of negative self-talk. I am hoping it illustrates how crazy we can get sometimes with the way we speak to ourselves. I am finding that by sharing my vulnerabilities I can more actively debunk the lies I tell myself. We all deserve better than the lies we tell ourselves!
xoxo
Shelbee
Michele Morin
I am working on this as well. It’s a struggle to remember to TALK to myself rather than listening to my negative mental messages.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I totally relate to that, Michele. When I actively engage in really talking to myself, I can generally maintain much more balance than when I stop talking and just keep listening to the negativity that creeps in. We really do have the power to change our own thoughts. It is just a very active task and will not happen if we don’t do the work, you know. But my goodness, sometimes the work can be so exhausting, can’t it?! Thanks for stopping by. I hope you have a wonderful weekend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Sheila (of Ephemera)
Wise words, Shelbee! Those are all things I used to bring up at my Weight Watchers meetings (I worked as a Leader/Coach for them for 9 years). I’m pretty good at taking care of the skin I’m in, but I need work in certain areas (self-talk, getting enough sleep).
We need to speak to ourselves the way we would speak to a friend. I think may of us (especially, but not limited to, women) are brought up to put everyone else’s needs before our own. It’s hard to un-train ourselves of those habits.
I love seeing you frolicking in the snow! So fun!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Sheila, thanks so much! I have been discussing this frequently with my therapist…why we are so negative to ourselves, why we latch onto the negative things more than the positive, and what it means to take up space in the world especially as a woman. That societal and cultural training is hard to break free from! I go through these phases where I feel like I do not deserve to use space or air in this world and I have been working hard to get to the bottom of it so I can effectively make some positive changes. Changing the way we speak to ourselves is probably the best place to start.
xoxo
Shelbee
lesa
This is all such good advice!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Lesa!
xoxo
Shelbee