The Beauty in Strangeness & #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #226
“There is no exquisite beauty… without some strangeness in the proportion.”
Edgar Allen Poe
This famous Edgar Allen Poe quote has been truncated to the shortened version on my tee shirt and, for some reason, it carries a bit more punch when it says, “There is no beauty without some strangeness.” Yet strangeness is a thing that makes many people cringe and run away in fear. I, on the other, find myself drawn to strangeness in very powerful and profound ways.
I was having a little thinking session on a long drive the other day and it occurred to me that I have always struggled with conformity of any sort. Whether it is fashion, religion, politics, sexuality, education, relationships, or anything else in life, I have always strayed very far away from the traditional ways of the world. Really for as long as I can remember, the things that the masses do and say are the things that really frighten me, perhaps in a similar way that strangeness frightens the masses. So at some point early in my life, I began paving my own alternate route.
My path has taken me on a journey between those little category boxes where I seem to always have to check Other, which I have often interpreted to mean Weirdo as in “Hey Weirdo, if you can’t check one of the boxes above, then I guess you have to check this one that says Other“. While the limited options of boxes has frustrated me over the years, I have come to learn that all the so-called strangeness in the world lingers between those boxes. The view is much more vibrant here than it could ever possibly be all crammed inside some tiny little box filled with way too many people vying for their best position. Plus I am a bit claustrophobic so I would never survive stuffed into an overcrowded box anyway.
I have discovered something by not jumping into any of the boxes. There is an astonishing beauty in the strangeness that I have witnessed simply by taking the road less traveled, the path between the boxes. It is a longer path, but the rewards are limitless. I have been blessed to meet and befriend some of the most fascinating, inspiring, colorful people in between the boxes. And the really cool thing is that none of us is taking the same route through the box maze and so our paths tend to weave and intersect in the mostly wonderfully unexpected ways that make this life that much more rewarding.
Along the way, I have chosen not to fear that which is different from me. Rather, I prefer to embrace different when it comes into my life because different is exactly the thing that teaches us the things hat we do not know. If we stop learning, we stop growing. When we stop growing, we stop living. And I want to live to be 150! So I allow my eyes, my ears, my mind, and my heart to always remain open and willing to accept the next experience before me in the hopes that I will learn something new to further enrich myself as a human being.
So if you have your freak flag hidden somewhere far away from judging eyes, I want to remind you that not all eyes are judging. There are plenty of us between the box people who want to see you, hear you, know you, and be inspired by you. So let your freak flag fly and I will salute you as I march on by waving my own with enthusiasm and pride. Always remember, there is no beauty without some amount of strangeness.
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Keeping it on the edge,
Shelbee
Linking up with these Fabulous Link Parties.
Outfit Details: Blazer and Tee Shirt-Torrid / Skirt-Target / Boots-JustFab / Jewelry-All old
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.
70 Comments
Pamela Graham
What a strange and hideous world it would be if we were not allowed to be individuals and not allowed to question? A world of stereotypes! Most of us will never be leaders but how grateful we are for the opportunity to challenge and freedom of speech when it’s necessary. Keep waving that freak flag!
Pamela x
http://www.style-yourself-confident.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Pamela! I have always said that it would be a supremely boring existence if we all looked and acted the same! And also kind of creepy, I think, if we were a species of identical automatons! I can’t even picture an image like that without getting chills down my spine. All the freak flags out there really do add infinite beauty to our world!
xoxo
Shelbee
Michele Morin
I am sure that even God delights in the beauty found in the quirky. Just look at the odd varieties of plants and animals!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Michele, I agree with you completely! We were made exactly as was intended by our creator and we should celebrate it all with pride! Thanks for this comment!
xoxo
Shelbee
Kathrine Eldridge
I love that you embrace your strangeness. Beauty if definitely found there! My guess is that you are a 4 or 5 on the enneagram. Have you heard of this and taken then test? I would love to know. I am a 2 wing 3. Love the cool tee and the this satin skirt is so pretty. I adore the bold purple color! Thanks for the link up.
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Kathrine, thank you so much! I am definitely an Enneagram Type 5, very investigative on all things, so you are totally on point with that guess!
xoxo
Shelbee
Jill
Love this encouraging post! I think we all have a little strangeness in us and that’s what makes us unique. Your skirt is fabulous! Such a beautiful color!
Jill – Doused in Pink
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so much, Jill! I agree that we all do have a little bit of strangeness in us and that is exactly the thing we should celebrate most about ourselves! Have a fabulous freaky day, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Suzy
Shelbee…how I LOVE YOU! This post is beyond amazing, my friend. I want to fly my freak flag as much as possible, although most people would probably put me in one of the general boxes, I’d actually rather not be put into a box, to be honest. I’m know I might seem pretty normal to the outside world, but I know I’m not on the inside LOL! And I do love that about myself. Like I said, I just need to fly my freak flag much more often—and I think I’m starting to do that now that I’m discovering my creative side through the photography YAY!
You look beautiful by the way—I NEED that skirt in my life!!!!!!
Huge freaky hugs
Suzy xx
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Suzy, I love you right back! Because I have seen little hints of your freak flag and it is one of the most wonderfully beautiful and vibrant flags that I have ever seen! Now I am thinking we should have a freak flag contest where we design our own flags that represent who we are. Ha. That might be really fun except I don’t think I am creative enough to design my own flag, freak or not! I love how you are starting to show more and more of your creative self with the world. I am trying to do the same lately. This life is way too short to hide the most unique things about ourselves. Sending big freaky hugs right back to you!
xoxo
Shelbee
Amy Johnson
Such a good article. It seems to me the world today is all about “Group Think”. If you don’t share the same thoughts that MSM spouts every day, you are “Cancelled”. This one world thought or mind, is scary too me.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Amy, thank you so very much! Group Think really is a frightening concept, isn’t it? And we definitely live in a culture where you are canceled if you don’t agree with the majority narrative. But I will continue my efforts to always share the minority view on things to hopefully illustrate that all points of view are valid and different does not mean wrong! I hope you are having a wonderful week, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Kellyann Rohr
That graphic tee is honestly the best I have seen in a long time – I love the phrase! You share and encourage so much openness in this space Shelbee, it’s such a comfort and call to action at the same time. My hope would be for those who read this and don’t feel they have a freak flag to fly that taking the time to get to know, try to understand, and refrain from passing judgement can lead to amazing relationships!
xo,
Kellyann
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Kellyann, thank you so much. You always leave such beautifully insightful comments. I also hope that those without a freak flag to fly can come to better understand how beautiful freak flags can be and learn to appreciate how much diversity in all things enriches our lives. I hope you have the most wonderful day, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Christina Morley
When I moved to South Africa, I had to come to terms with my alien status. I always thought aliens were bad, but now I was one. I decided it’s just a label and it doesn’t define me. I just googled it and discovered that “resident alien” is also a term used in the States. 😀
Thanks for hosting the link-up! Have a great week!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Tina, thanks so much for sharing that bit about your experience with being an “alien” in a foreign country. That is something I never even considered, but I bet that is a real struggle to come to terms being labeled an alien. Such a weird word!
xoxo
Shelbee
Jennifer
The tie dye and the colour of the skirt match perfectly!!
Jennifer
Curated By Jennifer
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks, Jennifer. It was like a match made in purple heaven! Have a great day!
xoxo
Shelbee
Anne M Bray
Keep seeking the strange, my friend! Great post.
A surprise package is in the mail! USPS estimates a Friday delivery (but you know how that might go).
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Gah, thanks so much, Anne! I can’t wait to see what’s in it! Something that will go beautifully with my freak flag, I’m sure! You’re the best.
xoxo
Shelbee
Tamar A Strauss-Benjamin
Love the shiny skirt, too!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Tamar!
xoxo
Shelbee
Renee Open
First, I LOVE that skirt <3
Second, we are kindred <3 I feel the same way. I loath conformity. The moment I see a trend of any kind I immediately want to look at it critically and be a counter balance to it. I have made so many choices to live outside so many boxes and you are absolutely correct – the benefits are boundless and beautiful. Strangeness is beautiful <3
Wonderful post <3
Thank you for hosting and talk to you soon 😉
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Renee, thank you for this wonderful comment! We really do have a tremendous amount of things in common. So I just did a quick search for Gemini-Libra compatibility because I never really looked at it before and now I see that these two signs are highly compatible in many areas. My sister is a Libra and she is absolutely my very best friend in all the world (along with my husband, of course)! I am looking forward to chatting later today. We are gonna make it work this time!
xoxo
Shelbee
jess
Hey friend!
Back in middle school, these boys called me a “Geek” and I ran home to look up in the dictionary what that meant. Ok, I am not a circus performer that bites the heads off of snakes, but I can be a nerd at times! I think I took it a bit too literal.. I do think that many people have some strangeness to them, but that can make it interesting in life!
Love the tee-shirt, and we saw Edgar Allen Poe and his girlfriend’s grave on a night tour in Charleston.
The purple skirt looks very cool with it!
jess xx
http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Jess, thanks so much for sharing your geek-status with me! I am a total geek and have always been. I am so glad that there has been a cultural shift since we were in grade school. Being smart and nerdy is cool these days! At least the previous generation finally figured out that much. I agree that we all have something unique and intersting about ourselves to share with the world and that itself is what makes us so similar. So I can’t understand why more people don’t embrace all the weirdness around us and within us!
That is wicked cool that you saw Poe’s grave! If I ever make it to Charleston I am going to need to add that my bucket list of things to do.
xoxo
Shelbee
Ashley
There is ABSOLUTELY beauty in strangeness! And it’s so lovely that you’ve embraced your desire to not conform and that’s lead you to so many beautiful discoveries about yourself and the world. 🙂
-Ashley
Le Stylo Rouge
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Ashley! I have always found more beauty in the things that are different and weird than I ever have in the things that scream conformity. Keep shining bright, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Katie
Love this quote from Poe and how you styled your outfit around this tee. This is such a wonderful post about celebrating the strangeness and uniqueness in life and in ourselves. Thanks for hosting and enjoy your week, Shelbee!
-Katie
http://www.hellokatiegirlblog.com/
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Katie, thank you so much! We should celebrate our unique strangeness every day in whatever way makes us shine the brightest! I hope you are having a wonderful week, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Sheila (of Ephemera)
Although I’m very fond of my boxes (nice smooth walls, quiet, just room for me), I am also WAY out of the box in many things, including fashion. My favourite Poe quote is, “I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity” which I have on a cuff, and I’m a big fan of ravens. Don’t put me into a box that I don’t choose for myself!
I love your skirt – is is sequins or a shiny fabric, can’t tell. Love it with the striped frock coat, Shelbee! Here’s to the weirdos!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Sheila, I love your approach to boxes! Sometimes, it is nice to hide away from all the worldly chaos inside of a nice, quiet, safe box. But it definitely has to be a box of my own choosing! I bite if you try to shove me inside of a box that I don’t want to be in! Haha. I am really liking the Poe quote that you shared as well! And my skirt is just a shiny purple satin type fabric. No sequins on this one. Cheers to all the fabulous weirdos in the world!
xoxo
Shelbee
Sheila (of Ephemera)
Sh*t! Thank you so much for the linky-party, m’dear! I’ve linked up twice, like a greedy-guts. 😛
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Well, you are very welcome, Sheila! And you can be as greedy as you want and link up 5 or even 10 posts if you feel compelled to do so! Honestly, that is the best way to get me to read and comment. By the time I finish all the linked posts, I have run out of steam for reading any others! So link away, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Nora Minassian
Sometimes normal can be boring right? All of us need some quirkiness at times, that is what makes life more interesting and exciting. Love your skirt, such a pretty color.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Nora! Normal can really get boring quickly! I do like to keep things interesting and colorful as we trudge on through this crazy world!
xoxo
Shelbee
Darlene
Very thought-provoking post, Shelbee. I learned to embrace my “differentness” when we moved constantly as I was growing up. I was often the new kid at school. So I learned to be strong and accept that what made me different was OK. Interesting that I ended up an educator, but even there I have always had a far less stringent style than many others. I love the “freak flag” reference. It reminds me of Owen Wilson in The Family Stone movie when he tells SJP that she is flying hers! Lol! Cute tee and I love that slip skirt–gorgeous color, my friend!
xx Darlene
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Darlene! I think I got the freak flag phrase from The Family Stone! But there is also a really cool song, Freak Flag, by an amazing jam band called Here Come the Mummies. Actually, I think I need to go add that link into the blog post!
I think well traveled people, especially those who moved a lot as children, definitely have a unique world view that differs greatly from those who remain in the same place for their entire lives. Traveling is exactly the thing that exposes us to new and different and helps us to grow an appreciation for the uniqueness that we encounter along the way. While moving around a lot as a cild may be a struggle during the process, the end result is a much more vibrant existence! I love your attitude about it all! Rock on with your fabulously unique self, my friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Nancy
Yeah for freaks! I never walked with the mass. Even when I was 12 and everyone loved Grease, and I didn’t……at all! I like being a bit weird.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
And this is exactly why you and I connected very quickly upon making our acquaintance over 5 year ago! We are the best kind of freaks! And I am so blessed to have found you in between all the category boxes. But I do have to tell you that Grease is one of my all time favorite movies along with Grease 2!
xoxo
Shelbee
Carrie @ Curly Crafty Mom
I think that is why I enjoy your posts so much, you always talk about stuff noone else talks about! And, the content is always so interesting! That skirt is so pretty, that violet color just pops and I love different textures in an outfit. I just ordered a striped jacket kinda similar to the one you are wearing here, I can’t wait to style it!
Carrie
curlycraftymom.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Carrie, thank you so very much! I wish I could get motivated to share more inspiring and thought provoking content. But I have gotten super lazy with writing meaningful posts this past year! I guess it does require more energy to write these types of things than it does to share just an outfit post. As much as I enjoy just an outfit post, I never wanted to be a blog like that! And so I try to share posts like this when the inspiration hits! I am looking forward to seeing your new striped jacket!
xoxo
Shelbee
Joanne
What a fabulous outfit and I love that saying on your tee! I think we all need to embrace our weirdness. My kids for sure are “quirky!” and I have taught them long and hard to be true to themselves.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Joanne, thank you so much! It is so important to teach our kids to stand firm in their individuality! In fact, I have hammered that into my kids so much that they now call me out if I yell at them for being loud, obnoxious, and/or weird! Haha. They fire right back at me, “Why are you trying to change us, Mom? This is who we are!” There’s nothing a like a smart kid to shine some light on our downfalls!
xoxo
Shelbee
Lizzie
Absolutely love this outfit on you! That skirt is stunning! And I completely identify with you on this issue. I actually filmed a video on it recently! I think that we are all unique with different gifts, styles, personalities and that is what makes us special and sets us apart from the crowd. Going down the road less travelled is more fun and exciting! And I think it’s vital that we all accept each other and more importantly, ourselves.
Lizzie
http://www.lizzieinlace.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Lizzie! There is an irony in human nature in that we are similar to one another because we all possess different and unique qualities. When we can accept and embrace our differences, that is where the real beauty of life begins! I have met some really amazing people on the road less traveled and so I will just continue on this path! Keep shining bright, my beautiful friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Michelle
People confuse different with dangerous. And that has led to all kinds of heartache for humanity. Different religion? War! Different sexual orientation? Banished by family, harassed, terrorized, murdered. Homeless? Judgment. Cruelty.
As for me? I’ve never fit in any group until I got good at identifying those who don’t fit in any boxes. We are the unboxed! 😜
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I agree, I agree, I agree! We are the unboxed! The people between the boxes. And we are so very interesting, too! I have learned to seek out and find the unboxed people as well…they are MY people after all! Thank you for this very meaningful comment and important perspective, Michelle!
xoxo
Shelbee
Michelle,
Oh! And I love that purple skirt! It is divine! Fabulous outfit!
Michelle
https://mybijoulifeonline.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Michelle! I kind of knew that you would!
xoxo
Shelbee
Rena
Shelbee,
I think that too many boxes can be just as confounding as too few. Besides, it’s algorithyms that need those boxes, people don’t. Meaningful connections are not made because of a check in the right box; those connections are made from a willingness to learn and accept.
And of course, you look amazing. Dare I say, radiant.
Rena
http://www.finewhateverblog.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, Rena, thanks so much, my sweet friend! Too many boxes really are confounding! Other than the age box, I really do find myself checking “other” more than any other box! Ha. I agree that meaningful connections are made from a willingness to learn and accept. It is our differences that really do enrich our experiences with other people. Keep being awesome!
xoxo
Shelbee
Laura Bambrick
What a wonderful surprise to see my post featured! Woohoo! I’ve been blogging 8 years and it’s still fun to see things like that! I love how open and truthful you are Shelbee! Great post and I love that tee!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Laura! You know, after 6 years of blogging, I still get excited about being featured, too! There is nothing quite so validating as “peer recognition”!
xoxo
Shelbee
Cheryl Shops
Honestly, I’d much rather be strange than normal—strange people are far more interesting! Of course, I also find comfort in the fact that everyone thinks they’re a little weird; we often have more in common than we think 😉
Cheryl Shops | http://www.cherylshops.net
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Cheryl, I agree with you completely! I think we do all have a bit of strangeness within us but it may not be all that strange after all…the irony is that our uniqueness is what makes us all so similar!
xoxo
Shelbee
Gail
Great post Shelbee. Most of us have a freak flag of some sort. I’ve always been curious, and an expert in miniutae and trivia, which made me stand out as freaky when I was a kid. But how I’ve enjoyed those interests and research says the more curious you are, the more likely you are to stave off dementia.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Gail! I love this idea that curiosity is good for our mental health! I feel like life is all about how much can I learn and know as I shift and grow. Always a work in progress and proud to fly my own freak flag!
xoxo
Shelbee
Midlife and Beyond
What a boring world it would be if we were all the same. I loved this post , we are all a little strange inside, which makes life more interesting for sure. What a gorgeous satin skirt, beautiful colour and I love those boots too.x
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Alison! I think we definitely all do have a little bit of strange within us. And we should celebrate that instead of hiding it away in fear of judgments from all the people who still hide their freak flags!
xoxo
Shelbee
Patrick Weseman
Amen to this. I so agree with you. I can go on and on about my place in the world and my struggles being who I am throughtout my life. But the more and more I live. I like my quriks and my weirdness. I conform for things like work (somewhat) but I never like dealing with the masses. I could type more but I will leave it with this: “You were born an original, so why die a copy.”
This was funny on FB, someone asked in a high school group I belong to, what have you been doing in the years after graduation, I wrote I was a boring SPED teacher and someone who knows me repiled “Patrick, you have never been boring.”
Thanks for hosting and I hope that you have a wonderful rest of the week. You look so very sweet.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Patrick, thank you so much! And I agree with your friend that you are definitely NOT boring! I am embracing my quirks and nonconformist ways much more lately. I guess that is the benefit of aging…we know more about the world and ourselves and then we start giving way fewer fucks than ever before! I hope you are having a wonderful week as well.
xoxo
Shelbee
Lovely
I LOVE this skirt and that’s a beautiful saying on your tee. Totally adore that striped coat over the tee.
xoxo
Lovely
http://www.mynameislovely.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Lovely! I feel in love with this skirt at first sight!
xoxo
Shelbee
Chickenruby
I’m loving your style
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so much! I really appreciate that. Have a wonderful weekend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Emma Peach
I’ve always had a rebellious streak – in my teens when everyone else at school was listening to pop music I was listening to rock music and wearing a man’s leather biker jacket and tight jeans! Some parents wouldn’t let their daughters associate with me…because of what I wore! Talk about small minded! The older I get the less I want to blend in. Fly that freak flag!
Emma xxx
http://www.style-splash.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Oh my gosh, Emma, I love this comment! And I can tell you that my parents would have let me hang with you because they always supported everyone’s right to fly their freak flag! I bet you looked super cool in your tight jeans and biker jacket. I think I dressed similarly. I have learned in life that small minded people live much smaller lives than the rest of us. So I will keep flying my freak flag and admiring all the others that do as well! Have a great weekend, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Claire
I love this look. Your skirt is beautiful and I love how you styled it. Thanks so much for hosting and linking up.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so much, Claire! I found this skirt on the winter clearance racks and I am glad that I grabbed it because I love it. This is the second time I have styled it on the blog and I am sure you will see it again. Have a great day!
xoxo
Shelbee