Raising the Future & Link Up On the Edge #102

July 13, 2018 / 62 Comments

*This is not a sponsored post. All thoughts and opinions are entirely my own.

Raising the Future. Oh boy. That is an intimidating responsibility, isn’t it? An obligation that must be taken seriously. One that we cannot approach by simply flying by the seat of our pants. The moment we bring our children into this world or assume custodianship of a child, we become primarily responsible for forming and shaping their world views. And their views of the world will determine how they go forth into adulthood, it will impact how they view all things, it will contribute to their reactions, their work ethic, their level of emotional maturity. Their beliefs and convictions on nearly every matter are influenced greatly by our own beliefs and convictions. So we better have a concrete understanding of our own beliefs before instilling them in our youth.

Tee Shirt: Old Navy EveryWear Graphic Crew Neck Tee
Skirt: Torrid. Similar here, here, and here.
Kimono: Similar options here, here, and here.
Clutch: DSW. Similar here, here, and here. 

The problem is that sometimes we don’t have a firm comprehension of our own world views because ours were handed down to us by our own parents or guardians. At some point, however, we need to gain a clear understanding of what we stand for, what we believe in, what is important to us, and what we can let slide. As we mold our children into the curators of the future, we need to be aware of the consequences of our own deeply held judgments and assumptions. We need to constantly reevaluate and revise our personal world views to ensure that we are creating a future where our children and their children can thrive and live their best lives. Hand me down values and beliefs, which become antiquated and obsolete throughout the generations, are no longer acceptable or adequately functional.

Shoes: Charlotte Russe. Other options here and here.

We have to change the course of what our parents and their parents and their parents’ parents believed and taught. We live in a much different world than they did. A world that is filled with different obstacles, different challenges, different dangers, different people. We are all much different people from the generations before us. And we have to accommodate those differences by letting go of the old world views passed down from our ancestors and start creating new, more modern views of the world we currently live in.

Well, how the hell do we do that? We start by letting go of archaic beliefs that may have worked in years gone by. We need to discard opinions and viewpoints that no longer serve us. We essentially need to wipe the slate clean and start assessing the world around us from our very own perspective. We create new thoughts and theories based solely on our personal experiences. We allow and encourage our children to do the same.

We teach them to let go, to reevaluate, to learn new things. We teach them to consider other views but to make determinations based on their own thoughts. We teach them to be unique and thoughtful and introspective. We teach them to question and learn. We teach them to be unafraid to be who they are and to stand firm in their own convictions. We teach them to go forth into the world with kindness and love and goals and dreams and confidence and flexibility and determination and conviction. We teach them to hold on, to let go, to be cautious and courageous, to plant roots and to fly free. We teach them to reach and strive and hold still every now and then to catch their breath and regain composure. We teach them to be a perfect composition of their own unique qualities and to embrace their individuality while appreciating the differences and unique qualities of everyone around them. We teach them patience and acceptance. We teach them the things we were taught and the things we learned on our own. And we teach them to be real, genuine, loving human beings with an understanding of the importance of continuous growth through knowledge.

If you, too, are raising the future, understand that is an extraordinarily important task. Approach it with care and clarity and take it seriously while still being able to hold onto a sense of whimsy and humor. It is hard work, indeed, raising the future. How are you doing it?

Necklace: Vintage Inspired Statement Necklace c/o Happiness Boutique.  

And now the featured favorites from last week.

Trina of Tipsy Heelz shared her inspiring post, Love Your Body, Love Your Life. There is really nothing quite like self-love to boost your confidence and just make your life much more fulfilling. Anyone struggling with self-love or even those who just need a reminder, you should go read Trina’s post!

Trina of Tipsy Heelz

“Smile in the mirror…look yourself in the eye and declare ‘I love my body’ and then smile.” -Trina

And Betsy of Natty Gal shared this amazingly easy recipe for the hot and humid dog days of summer. I am definitely adding this to my meal planning for next week!

From Betsy of Natty Gal

“Grilled stone fruit in season is an especially nice accompaniment.” -Betsy

 

(For that recipe, hop on over to Betsy’s post!)


Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

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62 Comments

  • Jodie

    July 13, 2018 at 2:14 pm Reply

    I just have to say that it makes me a little relieved that I don’t have to do this…not that I’m lazy. But I know from being a boss, I would question everything over and over and wonder if I was doing it right. And to think of the ramifications…oy!!
    But you have the right idea, and obviously are doing such a great job, Shelbee!!
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:49 am Reply

      Jodie, thank you so much for this comment! And even if you don’t have children, you still set examples through leadership for younger people around you. And I am sure you were responsible for guiding your employees to more enriched lives. I think there are so many teaching opportunities in life for everyone to learn and grow!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Patrick Weseman

    July 13, 2018 at 2:36 pm Reply

    So very true about the future. That is what I tried to do with my two also I am selfish and greedy because I know if they get decent jobs then my social security check will be higher. LOL. But I want them to be good stewards of this Earth.

    Looking nice and I read the signs on the fence and I hope you didn’t get into any trouble.

    Thanks for hosting and I hope that you have a wonderful weekend.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:44 am Reply

      Patrick, thanks so much for sharing your view on the topic! And who wouldn’t want their social security check to be higher? Knowing what I know about you, I am sure that your children are very good stewards on this earth! And nope, I didn’t get into any trouble. I was not tampering at all…I was merely standing in front of the fence! But I did like the warning signs behind me for this post. It made me chuckle a little! I do appreciate your concern though…and it would have made for a funny story if I had gotten in trouble! Have a great weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Tiina L

    July 13, 2018 at 2:41 pm Reply

    I loved this post, and your idea that we should not burden our children with outdated beliefs and values. And I think we all, whether we have children or not, should update your world view from time to time.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:40 am Reply

      Tiina, thank you so much! In the book I am reading, the author keeps using the term “hand me down values” and I absolutely the image that conveys. Like all old and worn out and out of style! We do need to constantly revise our views with each new stage of life and set of experiences. Otherwise, we just get stuck! And stuck is not a good place for anyone to be.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Elizabeth Ramsey

    July 13, 2018 at 2:45 pm Reply

    Knowing that you are, in part, raising the future gives me infinite hope for it. Kindness begets kindness. Love begets love. Love the blush and black pairing and the buttons/snaps along side the skirt – great way to go from serious to sexy in a blink of the eye! Thanks so much for the feature in your post today!! XOXO

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:37 am Reply

      Betsy, thank you so much for the lovely compliment and for your vote of confidence! I just do the best I can every day with what I’ve got! I hope I am setting a good example for my children. Only the future will tell! And it was pleasure to feature that delicious recipe you shared! Have a wonderful weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Rachael Thomas

    July 13, 2018 at 3:07 pm Reply

    What a fun outfit! I love the mix of edgy and feminine, and what great shoes! Parenting is hard work, am I’m always questioning if I’m doing a good job. I just hope my boys become honest, good men.
    Rachael

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:36 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Rachael! It really is a hard job, raising these kids. But if your goal is raise honest, good men, then I am pretty sure you are on the right track! We all question what we are doing though, I think it is a natural response. No one ever gave any of us that illusive parenting manual!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:22 am Reply

      I can only imagine, Tamar! You have one of the hardest jobs on the planet! But the fact that you feel the pressure is a good thing because it means you take it seriously and practice it diligently and you will act in the best interest of the children. Thank you for stopping by and thank you even more for the job yo do!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:16 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Nancy! I kind of figured you were going to like this outfit! I do know how you love all black! But then you styled that fabulously colorful outfit which looks so amazing on you! See you for some fun hat looks on Sunday!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Jennie

    July 13, 2018 at 4:55 pm Reply

    Very insightful post and stylish look! I really like how you dressed up your statement tee (and what a statement tee it is!) with the pretty lace up skirt and rose gold.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:15 am Reply

      Jennie, thanks so much! This was a really fun outfit to create…and I was kind of just flying by the seat of pants (or should I say flying by the seat of my skirt?) and threw it together. But it definitely worked!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Robin LaMonte

    July 13, 2018 at 5:16 pm Reply

    Shelbee,

    Very thought provoking blog post today!
    Raising the future with grace and respect for one another should be all of our duties.
    Even as a new grandma I need to set an example for my grandchildren.
    Our society has grown into a very disrespectful one and a lot of ugliness is going. Our future is watching and listening to all of this and it concerns me very much!

    Thank you for joining my link up and I look forward to your link ups too!

    Hugs,
    Robin
    https://helloim50ish.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 13, 2018 at 7:17 pm Reply

      Robin, thank you so much for your thoughtful comment! I agree with you that we do all need to step up and set the example for a future that will be filled with love and kindness rather than disrespect and hatred. The children see way more than we think they do! I hope you are having a wonderful summer, my friend…and enjoying those grandchildren!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Susan

    July 13, 2018 at 7:48 pm Reply

    I am not raising the future, thank God in Heaven! Good for you, that you are raising the future, and that you look so cute doing so. Those heels would cause me shin splints, but they are soooo stinkin cute! Do you realize how difficult it is to find really cute shoes with a two inch heel? Or in a flatform? This is what I get for wearing six inch platforms in the 70’s.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 11:09 am Reply

      Susan, thank you so much! These shoes are just a tad bit too high for me…like 1/4 inch too hogh. I was hobbling a bit especially trying to climb on rocks and stuff! And I hear you about lower heels…they either completely flat or at least 3 inches high. But check all those online sites, you might be able find some really cute ones…like Shoe Dazzle and Just Fab. Six inch platforms, wowsers! If you have any pictures of those, I wanna see them!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

      • Susan

        July 14, 2018 at 11:53 am Reply

        There is a picture of me in my high school yearbook, sporting six inch WOODEN platform heels. They were heavy as could be, and when I walked from class to class, made so much noise (echoing down the hallway), teachers would spring from their desks to see what was the clatter! LOL. Of course, my 16 year old self loved it, even if I did have to take them off to go upstairs. No matter! They looked fierce with my black velour jeans and Led Zeppelin T-shirt.

  • Kellyann Rohr

    July 13, 2018 at 9:41 pm Reply

    Wowzers Shelbee, you are one hot momma raising the future! What an incredibly gorgeous and sexy look – that kimono and those shoes are so perfect with the black tee and skirt. Stunning my friend, simply stunning!
    xo,
    Kellyann

  • Maria | passion fruit, paws and peonies

    July 14, 2018 at 6:52 am Reply

    I enjoy discussing with my children how our generational standpoints has us coming up with a different belief or idea. As long as there is respect for others, I think that it’s great to see the new generation reach their own conclusions as society evolves. Some views need to be dropped even by the older generations simply because some have always been wrong and it’s about time they changed! Have a great weekend my friend xxx

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 14, 2018 at 10:31 am Reply

      Maria, thank you so much for sharing this! The book I am reading has been talking about how our cultures and specifically our immediate families are primarily responsible for the formation of our initial world view. Of course, because when we are young our entire world exists within the tiny little framework of family. Naturally, everyone’s view of the world will be completely different, family by family, and like you said, as long as we can respect each other and our differences, then we are headed in the right direction. And then really, who is the ultimate authority on deciding which views are right and which are wrong? It really is difficult to get the brain around that one!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 15, 2018 at 11:09 pm Reply

      Cherie, thank you so very much! I have this same skirt in red and black plaid that I styled in the winter. It really is quite fantastic! And yes, parenting is an incredible responsibility. However, while I was raising the future yesterday, today I feel more like squashing them! Long, hot summer weekends are a much bigger challenge than I ever expected!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • jacqui berry

    July 16, 2018 at 7:31 pm Reply

    I’m now onto helping my daughter raise her children, I’m sure it gets harder. Thanks for sharing this post, you’ve done a great job and I love the skirt, tee and fabulous shoes. Jacqui Mummabstylish

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 17, 2018 at 10:47 am Reply

      Jacqui, thanks so much! And I think the influence and different perspective from grandparents is also so important in raising our children. My kids love spending time with their grandparents and the grandparents love having them. In fact, I just sent them off for the week to their grandparents…and it is good for everyone!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Lucy At Home

    July 18, 2018 at 10:12 am Reply

    “We need to constantly reevaluate and revise our personal world views” – so true! I’ve changed my mind on a lot of things as I’ve grown up, not because I’m fickle but because I believe that circumstances change and so too should our opinions. We are in a constant state of learning.

    And someone really enjoyed this post because they added it to the BlogCrush linky to give it some extra blog love. Congratulations! #blogcrush

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 18, 2018 at 11:02 am Reply

      Lucy, thanks so much! I did see that it was added and I was so excited and honored! And I agree with you that with each new experience and change in circumstance, we have to reevaluate everything. We are in a constant state of flux right along with the rest of the world and if we can’t bend and move with the changes, it could be our demise. Thank you so much for sharing your perspective on the topic!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Marie Moody

    July 18, 2018 at 6:41 pm Reply

    Well, thank you so much for stopping by, and as far as Charlie is concerned this lil’ guy is a barker and drives me insane once he gets on a role… when I got him from Petfinder they didn’t know much about him other than a policeman found him on the street & no one claimed him for some time… and he HATES mail ladies/men and their trucks. Silly dog goes ballistic!!! SHEESH! He’s loud, but he’s a wussy for sure… it’s too funny… and YOU on the other hand… LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the shoes… you go girl!!! Your pics are too cool! Love the outfit, but the shoes are the best! Thanks for sharing!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      July 18, 2018 at 7:45 pm Reply

      Aw, Marie, thanks so much for your very kind and enthusiastic adoration of my shoes! And while they make look amazing, they are nearly impossible to walk in! They are sitting shoes, for sure. Similar to Charlie, I am a bit of a wuss when it comes to crazy high heels! And boy, he is one lucky fellow that he was brought into a home that is clearly filled with so much love…even if there are mail carriers around!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

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Shelbee on the Edge