Guest Post: What to Wear to a Nude Beach & #SpreadTheKindness Link Up #93

October 16, 2018 / 69 Comments
This is not a sponsored post.
  • Note from Shelbee: This post was written and contributed by my friend and avid blog reader, Susan Marinelli. Susan has very graciously offered to write some posts for me while I am still trying to figure out how to manage 3 part time jobs, 2 kids and a husband, and 1 blog. Plus, she has been considering starting her own blog (which I absolutely think she should) and wanted a little experience at writing in blog post form. I find Susan’s writing style an absolute joy to read and her sense of humor far surpasses any other human being I have ever met. She is hilariously witty and as left me in stitches on many occasions just in her comment threads on my blog posts. Let me introduce you all to Susan since she will most likely be contributing additional posts to Shelbee on the Edge.  A true example of how one can #SpreadTheKindness. I cannot adequately express my gratitude for this generosity except to simply say, “Thank you, Susan.”  Read on…I guarantee you will end with a smile on your face.

Hi, I am Susan Marinelli. I am an aged hippie from New Castle, Delaware, a very old town on the Delaware River. I live in my old, old house with my aged Scottie, Wally, and a most annoying cat named Gracie. My grandparents lived around the corner, where my father was born, and I am related to 99% of all the Italians in my town. I am inching toward retirement, and in the meantime, drive a school bus and a senior center bus so I don’t have to work in an office. I’ve done a lot of traveling, love to read, cook, garden, and am a fan of history and language. And of course, fashion. Here I am (and yes, I am holding an Italian flag).

Susan Marinelli (left), Guest Blogger

What to Wear to a Nude Beach

“This morning, I shot six holes in my freezer,
I think I’ve got cabin fever” –Jimmy Buffett

Somebody sound the alarm!

Jimmy wrote about being stuck in the cold. Jimmy hates the cold.

I’ve applied his quote to being stuck in endless summer. I hate the heat.

Today, it is 84 degrees and 76% humidity in my neck of the woods.

I’ve got a great bunch of fall clothes and I CAN’T WEAR THEM!!!

My air conditioner is still running! My hair is frizzy!

It is mid-October. Hence, the whining.

Whining being done (for now) since I am sweating my butt off in this October weather, Imma write a summer post.

I have been naked on the beach on two oceans, one sea, and two continents. How many of you can say that?

The Atlantic and Pacific Oceans and the Mediterranean Sea. Not simultaneously.

Catalina Island, the Florida Keys, Gaeta, Italy, and maybe on the beach just north of Ensenada, but I had tequila that night. I did NOT eat the worm. Oh, and Sandy Hook Beach in New Jersey, but technically it’s a Clothing Optional beach so you decide if that one counts. Oh, and Rehoboth Beach, but that was a wardrobe malfunction due to rough surf.

My family got over it after a decade or so…although it is still mentioned at holiday gatherings.

I am not a pervert nor an exhibitionist. I am fair skinned (dammit I am Italian!) and NOT a sun worshipper. I just came of age in the seventies. Nudity was more common then and more acceptable. At least it was to me, as I was much thinner and everything was where it was designed to be. If you wish to judge me, knock yourselves out.

I remember the first time I went to a nude beach. I was in agony: Where will I put my car keys? What if something bites me? Does this make me a pervert? Is everything shaved? Where is my Chapstick? Is everyone else there gonna be beautiful?

To shield you from agony, allow me to use my expertise in intercontinental nudity to your benefit. Here is what all the best nudists are wearing.

Or at least they were the last time I went.

Sunglasses: These should be large and wide and dark. If you can find a pair of those eye doctor sunglasses with the shields on the side, wear them. This will allow you to conceal your shock/envy/amazement (make sure to clamp your jaw shut) while also allowing you to check out everyone else with impunity.

Sunscreen: Duh!

Clothing: Wear a two piece suit in case you wish to swim.

Also, you have to wear something to the beach from the parking lot. Some of them have refreshment stands. And some of them have pervs sitting in the lot…many with binoculars.

Over the two piece suit, it is good to have a coverup, something floaty, so it can double as a sun/perv shield. All clothing articles should be easy to get on and off. I once watched a French Canadian FAMILY of five take off their Spandex on the beach. Mom, Pop, and kids. It is not something I ever want to see again. To digress for a moment, why is it that other countries are so much more relaxed about nudity? And what if my parents had been nudists, would I be normal today? Thanks Mom and Dad for being clothed at all times.

Jewelry is good only for having the sun glint off of. Wear it if you crave attention.

Sandals: Do not wear flip flops!!! I cannot stress this enough. I can assure you that on the flip or the flop, sand will come flying and land in horrible places, necessitating its removal. I, for one, don’t want anyone watching me remove sand from my armpit.

Or anywhere else.

But enough about that. You will figure it out.

Going naked in public was a learning experience. Clothes can be used to project many things as well as protect them.

You can hide behind them, use them as a defense mechanism, or you can make them work to your advantage, and show others how you feel about yourself. Clothes should be an enjoyable expression of your life.

Words should be that way as well but too often they are not. Clothes, like words, are tools to show others what you want them to see. Take away those tools and what you have left is yourself.

Judge Kindly.

Susan

And now for the link up fun and your favorites from last week.

Jacqui of Mummabstylish looks stunning in her magenta wedding guest outfit in her post, Michaela Louisa Worked for Me!

Jacqui of Mummabstylish

Kellyann of This Blonde’s Shopping Bag shared a gorgeous fall look for a super humid climate in her post, Ageless Style October: Show Us Your Fall Colors.

Kellyann of This Blonde’s Shopping Bag


Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups

All stock photo images c/o Unsplash.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

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