When You Go Outside Your Comfort Zone and Find Yourself…Uncomfortable

January 14, 2018 / 31 Comments

I am a huge proponent of pushing yourself outside of your comfort zone. Pretty much in any area of life. Great things happen out there. Wonderful opportunities and fabulous possibilities can be discovered just on the other side of where our comfort ends. And we can never find those things if we don’t occasionally dip our toes into that zone of discomfort. I have preached this concept time and again to athletes whom I have coached and to friends who are exploring major life changes as well as to people who just want to up their style game.

*This is a sponsored post. This velvet turban was provided to me by Banggood. As always, all thoughts and opinions are entirely my own.

In fact, I have written quite a few posts in the life of my blog addressing just how beneficial stepping outside of your comfort zone can be. In Out of My Comfort Zone: Camo and Floral, I explored a pattern combination in my outfit that felt very wrong to me and ended up being quite brilliant (thank you to Debbie of Fashion Fairy Dust for pushing me there). In Inspired By Hypnoz Glam: Reflections on Comfortability with Rosegal, I spoke more about how dangerous it can be to get too settled within the confines of your comfort zone (thank you to Edwige of Hypnoz Glam for inspiring that post). And in Facing My Fears at the Chico’s NYC Meet Up, I discussed how I was not going to let my fear of potential discomfort stop me from doing something fabulous (thank you to all of the amazing women who participated in that event, particularly Eugenia of The Age of Grace and Catherine of Catherine Grace O who poured their hearts in to coordinating that event).

*Skirt: Target. No longer available.

But sometimes, just sometimes, we take that chance to step outside our comfort zone and the only thing we find there is complete and total discomfort.  While the benefits of stepping outside of your comfort zone can be ever so rewarding, taking a chance is just that…a chance.  There is the possibility that pushing yourself past your limits could result in nothing other than you standing there in a place where are just plain old uncomfortable.

*Belt: Velvet Quilted Obi Belt from Torrid Salmon Run Mall.

Recently, this exact thing happened to me.  It is rather silly actually and quite harmless in the grand scheme of things. And my lesson has been learned…that in this particular case of comfortability, maybe I should just stay put right where I am comfortable.  That probably won’t happen though because I am always pushing past those limits.  Because what fun would life be if I just sat still in the same old boring space?

*Blazer: Thifted. 

You probably have noticed that I have recently been experimenting a lot with hats.  I just adore the way a cute hat can elevate any outfit and speak volumes about your personality.  I have been wearing wide brimmed felt hats, straw hats, cloche hats, berets, your standard knit beanies, and even the occasional fascinator.  I do adore the newsboy caps that are trending right now and look so adorable on my blogger friends whom I have seen sporting this style. I have tried on a few and they don’t seem to work that well on my head.  Recently, I have collaborated with Banggood and I chose two different hats…mostly because I can’t seem to get enough. My pink beret is absolutely fabulous, but I already knew that berets worked for me when I chose this one. And not wanting to always play it safe in my style choices as well as enjoying a good challenge that takes me way outside of my comfort zone, I decided that in addition to my pink beret, I would also try a velvet turban.

*Turban: Soft Velvet Turban c/o Banggood. Available in 2 colors.

Now let me be clear, I have never ever before put a turban of any kind on my head, so I was taking a bit of chance ordering this type of headwear online. But I have seen Judith of Style Crone rock a turban unlike any other and I became fascinated. Not to pretend that I possess anywhere near the hat pizazz that Judith does, I figured what the heck, let’s give it a go. The result…complete and total disaster discomfort! Turbans do not suit me, the size and shape of my head, or my style. Not. At. All.

Shirt and Necklace: Old.

I have no intention of implying that the turban itself is of poor quality. In fact, it is crafted from quite a lovely soft velvet with lots of stretch (which was conducive to properly accommodating the substantial circumference of my noggin). And the deep royal blue shade of the velvet is what caught my attention in the first place. It is simply the style of this headwear that is just not for me.

You can probably see how uncomfortable I am in the photos where the turban is properly situated on my head. Once I removed it, I settled back into my comfort zone and relaxed for the camera. Some may say the turban isn’t as bad I think, but my husband’s facial expression of complete and utter…um…repulsion…would indicate otherwise. Some may burst out into fits of laughter at my venture into the realm of turban-wearing. So laugh if you must because there is no one on this planet who has laughed at my expense more than myself. I can take a good chuckle directed right at me. It is good for the soul, in my opinion, to laugh at oneself and one’s own silly sartorial adventures. So I will leave the brilliance of turban styling to Judith and admire her through the screen of my computer while I quietly and discreetly tuck my velvet turban away in a drawer.

Maybe I will gain some fortitude in the future to try my turban again…perhaps with my hair styled differently. Maybe I won’t. I guess we will all find out at a later time how far outside my comfort zone I am willing to step.

*Boots: Kenneth Cole Renna from TJ Maxx. No longer available.

Have you ever taken the step outside of your comfort zone and found yourself flat on your face in a puddle of disappointment?! It’s always worth a good laugh when that happens, I think!

Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

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January 16, 2018

31 Comments

  • Dawn Bell Solich

    January 14, 2018 at 2:57 pm Reply

    In the photos (probably less so IRL) it sort of looks like a hat. I LOVE how you styled the rest of your outfit–choosing such an opposite look, rather than glam for example. I gotta say, I don’t think it looks bad on you at all! Love the subjects you’ve been writing about recently.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 14, 2018 at 4:33 pm Reply

      Thank you so much, Dawn! I guess it really is a hat styled as a turban. It is not an actual turban that involves wrapping and tucking and all that. And it wasn’t so terrible that I was afraid to post photos…just not my style and not suited for the shape and size of my head! Hahaha. I did it try on again after I curled my hair and it took on a sort of flapper feel, so I may try it again some day in a flapper-esque styling. I appreciate your support so much and I am so glad that you are enjoying my blog topics! I hope you are having a beautiful weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Gail

    January 14, 2018 at 3:56 pm Reply

    Thought provoking post Shelbee – as we get older we tend to stay in our comfort zones and not try anything risky. I was getting a bit like this but I broke out last year when I got a new job (after 20 years at the last company) and this year I’ve signed up for a couple of hard walking challenges. I am intrigued to try a turban now —–Judith always looks amazing in any type of hat and my hat collection has grown thanks to her!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 14, 2018 at 4:29 pm Reply

      Gail, thank you so much for this thoughtful comment! I definitely have been taking lots of risks in life in my 40’s and I am always glad that I took the risk in the end. Even in this case, I certainly don’t regret trying a turban. I just learned that it is not the style of hat for me. I also took a huge risk a little over a year ago that did involve some financial commitment. It pretty much failed due in part to some mistakes of my own as well as it simply just did not work out. I have no regrets and view it as a learning experience moving forward. I wish you all the best in your new job and your walking challenges! You will rock it all, I’m sure, because you have a great attitude. Thanks so much for stopping by and have a fabulous weekend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Rena

    January 14, 2018 at 6:40 pm Reply

    Another fabulous post on a thought provoking topic as well as your fantastic styling ideas. What I noticed most is that the sleekness of the hat seemed out of proportion to the rest of the ensemble. Perhaps you should try it with an outfit that has a body skimming silhouette? I hope that you’re having a wonderful weekend.

    Rena
    http://www.finewhateverblog.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 15, 2018 at 1:04 pm Reply

      Rena, thank you so much for this styling idea! I am thinking I need to go with a more flapper style for this hat. I agree, the whole thing just didn’t quite work. But I did like this outfit without the hat (except for the fact that my blouse was way too tight! haha!) And the turban looks much better if I curl my hair. So I agree, sleeker clothing maybe with a little flounce and curled hair might just do the trick. Thank you so much for stopping by and reading, my friend. Have a fabulous week!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • jodie filogomo

    January 14, 2018 at 10:26 pm Reply

    I really don’t think it looks at bad as you think, Shelbee. Sure, maybe it’s different, and maybe even a different outfit would change the look.
    But you have to admit that going outside our comfort zone with clothing is so easy, because if you don’t like it—there’s no permanent damage!!
    And many times it’s a win!!
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 15, 2018 at 12:56 pm Reply

      Thank you, Jodie! I agree with you on that…no harm done at all by going outside my comfort zone with this one and not having the desired result. It keeps life interesting and fun anyway! I did try the turban on with my hair all curled and it looked way cuter with the curls flipping around the bottom. I am thinking a flapper style dress and curled hair might do the trick!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Maureen

    January 15, 2018 at 11:07 pm Reply

    You look so cute in your outfit Shelbee. Love the skirt and shoes! Those embroidery details on the back of your shoes are something special. 😍 I agree with you wholeheartedly that going outside your comfort zone is important and I would be lying to you if I said I always did that. Because I don’t. I love my box and I love my routine. But when I have gone outside my comfort zone I can say that the most growth I have had happened outside my box’s four corners and asked myself why I didn’t do it sooner?! 😱😂 I hope you are having a great day so far.

    Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com

  • Nina

    January 16, 2018 at 12:53 pm Reply

    This post brough a major chuckle in our household. You don’t know how many times I’ve done a pre photo try on to have Roger recoil in shock or could it have been revulsion? And then we go shoot the photos, and, well, I prove him wrong most of the time. One of our best photos was a dress that he completely hated. I’m with you—we only live once, we might as well try a few things. At the worst, you have a good laugh—at best—you get an amazing photo! You simply cant go wrong. Hugs! Nina

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 16, 2018 at 1:09 pm Reply

      Nina, I love this comment and your attitude! You are absolutely right that you just can’t go wrong! I remember in the summer I styled a dashiki on a really hot day. It was so comfortable and lightweight and kept me cool and I was loving the vibrant colors and fun print. My husband absolutely abhorred it! And it was funny because I got a ton of positive feedback on IG, FB, and the blog when I shared it. It was out of the ordinary and fun, in my opinion. So these men…we love them unconditionally for all of their support (and photography skills), but sometimes their fashion opinions…eh, take them with a grain of salt! I am so glad that you and Roger both got a good chuckle out of this post this morning though. Thanks so much for reading!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Melissa

    January 17, 2018 at 3:39 pm Reply

    Stepping out of your comfort zone is something I am trying to do more of this year. There are a ton opportunities out there and I need to take advantage of…. now the outcome not something I expect is a fear everyone must have.
    I actually find it to look really cute on you, but you can totally see your transformation from when you had it on to when your doing your thang without 😉

    xo
    Mel

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 17, 2018 at 3:44 pm Reply

      Mel, thanks so much for this comment and for sharing your goals and observations! You can totally see how much I relaxed once I took the darn turban off! I could feel it all throughout my body, too. It was a pretty funny observation actually. But hey, I tried, and that’s all I can ask of myself! I look forward to seeing how far out of your comfort zone you will go this year. It’s going to be fabulous, I’m sure!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Claire

    January 20, 2018 at 9:41 pm Reply

    Lovely post and photo’s Shelbee. Love your skirt. I need to start pushing myself out of my comfort zone a bit more. Life can get boring if we don’t. Thanks for sharing at Creative Mondays 🙂

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 21, 2018 at 11:46 am Reply

      Claire, thanks so much! Life certainly can become boring if we settle down within our comfort zones and never try new things. I think one of the easiest ways to go outside our comfort zones is with our style choices. I look forward to seeing what different styles you will be exploring! Thanks for stopping by, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Emma Peach

    January 22, 2018 at 6:35 pm Reply

    I’m all for pushing outside of the comfort zone every so often, I get FOMO if I don’t! I’ve found that hats with a brim or peak suit me best, anything that fits snug and flat to my head looks weird (well it does to me). I think short hair helps with wearing a turban. That said, I don’t think the turban looks bad on you, it’s just that there are other styles of hat that suit you better. My husband oftern laughs at my hats but I don’t care!

    Emma xxx
    http://www.style-splash.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      January 22, 2018 at 9:04 pm Reply

      Emma, thank you for this wonderful comment! My husband is not a huge fan of hats at all either. But I agree with you…cloche hats and berets look much better on me! Sometimes I will wear a wide brimmed hat and they are not terrible but not as good as some others. I did try the turban on with my hair all curled and it looked a little better, but I may just leave well enough alone! I tried it, it didn’t work out, no harm done!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

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