The Fab 40’s Went Goth
For as long as I can remember, I have always been drawn to different fashion trends, never fitting into one clean little box of style. Throughout the seasons of my life as I have experimented with my own personal style, I have noticed that I favor certain styles more than others. But one genre of fashion that always makes me feel most comfortably like myself is Goth. Not the over the top, spikes and leather and morbid Goth, but a more subtle and tame version of Goth style.
When Suzy of Pixie Chick in Portugal chose this month’s theme for The Fab 40’s, my angsty heart from my teenage years sang the prettiest little somber tune filled with nostalgia and contentment. I can do Goth. I can do Goth better than most midlife women. Because Goth is where my love of fashion began. It is the heart and soul, the roots and wings, of my personal style. And I always love returning to that place. It makes me feel most like me.
But also, remaining true to myself, I have never been one to define my personal style within the confines of one single genre. There are always hints and suggestions of multiple other influences in each outfit that I style even if the overall appearance leans heavily in one direction. During my early teenage years, I was going to become Robert Smith’s secret mistress and hide on The Cure’s tour bus as his mysterious and dark little concubine. This may have been the point when head to toe black outfits became my favorite thing. I could hide while still making a statement. I think I was about 14 years old when I acquired my first pair of combat boots and they have remained a constant staple in my shoe wardrobe ever since. For 30 years, combat boots have been a steady fixture in the battle gear of my life. Give me a pair of badass combat boots and I can take on the world. Hell, I even wore combat boots on my wedding day, albeit they were a tamer, more feminine version of combat boots, but combat boots still. Always harkening back to my early teen years when I had my guard up and rebelled only through my sartorial choices.
Jump ahead just two years, still donned in black leather and combat boots, I found myself immersed in the new skateboarding culture. Tony Hawk was the love interest of every girl in my circle and the idol of all the boys as they attempted to perfect their tricks and become the next big name in skateboarding. During these early years of the skateboarding scene before girls took to the skateboards themselves, we just dressed the part of skate-betties in our plaid mini skirts, graphic tees, and Old Skool Vans. But when we weren’t hanging out at the newest skate park, we were moshing to the musical creations of some local punk bands at an isolated barn situated deep in the woods on the outskirts of town…back in our combat boots and bomber jackets.
Two years after that, I headed off to college and came of age when every girl swooned at the mention of Kurt Cobain. Nirvana was more than just a band. It was an ideal, a goal, a way of life, an obsession, the place we all wanted to reach. And the lyrics, sound, and style of Nirvana were going to take us there. Ripped jeans, faded flannels, and worn out hoodies defined our appearance. Every frontman of every local college band wanted to be Kurt Cobain and every teenage groupie wanted to be Courtney Love. And so Courtney’s punk style influences started to make their way into our closets, creating the perfect marriage with our grunge attire.
As these musical icons and their alternative, out of the box styles infiltrated my closet during my formative years, they took hold as the roots of own personal style. And these influences weave their way through my daily style choices in midlife. A combination of all of it with a more mature twist on most days. But sometimes, it’s just fun to go all out nostalgic and embrace my inner teenage Goth, punk, grunge, skater girl style.
So when Suzy said we are going Goth, what came to mind for me was black, corsets, laces, dark plaids, fishnets, chokers, dark lipstick, pigtails, and of course, my steadfast favorite, combat boots. And so here you have it, Grunge-Goth vibes, Shelbee-Style.
By the way, did you know there is a multitude of different subcultures just within the category of Goth style? This article is actually quite fascinating: 19 Most Notable Alternative Subcultures & Trends in the Last Decade. I am still trying to figure out why we are a culture so obsessed with defining everything. Some things should remain simply undefined as what they are. Because even with these 19 subcultures, I still don’t fit into one of them. And neither do any of my edgy, gorgeous Fab 40’s friends. But if anyone is desperately needing a definition of my style, I guess I’ll just stick with Shelbee-Goth on this one.
And now won’t you check out the amazing grown-up, midlife Goth style interpretations of my Fab 40’s friends.
Suzy of Pixie Chick in Portugal with her Biker-Goth look, Suzy-Style. How freaking cool and badass is Suzy in black lace and overalls? Serious style goals for me here!
Outfit Details:
Dungarees: H&M
Lace Top: Bershka
Black Boots: Doc Martens
Harry Potter Bag: Gift from Friends
Earrings: Very Old
Motorbike: Hubby’s
Daenel of Living Outside the Stacks with her Nerdy-Goth look, Daenel-Style. How adorably dark and mysterious is she in this Wednesday Addams-inspired dress? I have always been a fan of anything inspired by Wednesday Addams!
Outfit Details:
Dress and Shoes: Zulily
Tights: Old
Jennie of A Pocketful of Polka Dots with her Grown-Up Goth look, Jennie-Style. Seriously, how freaking kick ass is Jennie in her black fishnets, black leather, and killer shoes? Totally Grown-Up Goth in the most fabulous way!
Outfit Details:
Portofino Top: Express
Leather & Suede Skirt: Ivanka Trump
Jewelry: NY & Co.
Fishnet Tights: c/o Berkshire Hosiery
Shoes: Nine West
Sheela of Sheela Writes with her Haute-Goth look, Sheela-Style. The sweet Swiss dots and the impending dark plaid paired with the quintessential black leather choker send me waxing nostalgic…to a time when breaking hardened punk rock hearts was fun.
Outfit Details:
Dress: Thrifted
Swiss Dot Lace Top: Forever21
Choker: c/o ManicPanic NYC
Rings: Disney c/o my love @mdurdenx
Boots: Make Me Chic
Cuff: Loewe
Lipstick: Anastasia Beverly Hills
Mary of Curlybyrdie Chirps with her Preppy-Goth look, Mary-Style. I am feeling the Victorian roots of the Gothic subculture in the drama of Mary’s gorgeous plaid top.
And finally, Suzy’s Fab 40’s guest this month, Lizzy of What Lizzy Loves with her Mystic-Goth look, Lizzy-Style. Lizzy is seriously transcending all fashion expectations in this ethereal version of Goth vibes.
Outfit Details:
Dress: Marks and Spencer (last year)
Ankle Boots: Clarks (several years ago)
Tights: Topshop (current)
Choker (My late Grandmother’s)
And rounding out this month’s Fab 40’s Goth theme is my Grunge-Goth look, Shelbee-Style.
Outfit Details:
Top, Skirt, and Belt: Torrid
Plaid Jacket and Tights: Target
Coat: Talbots (Really, really old)
Earrings: Happiness Boutique
Tanker Boots: U.S. Patriot Tactical
Have you ever tried to define your own personal style? Do you fit into one genre or are you more of an eclectic combination of multiple trends that make your style uniquely yours, unlike any other?
Keeping it on the edge,
Shelbee
The Fab 40’s is a group of six fashion bloggers from around the globe. Each month we choose a different theme and invite a guest blogger who is also in their forties 40’s to join us. This group’s goal is to take on style trends and show how we each interpret and incorporate them into our own lives. With six widely varied views, you are certain to find something that speaks to you each month and encourages you to continue to have fun with fashion after the age of 40.
Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.
34 Comments
Tamar A Strauss-Benjamin
Oh my gosh, you are fierce!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, thanks, Tamar!
xoxo
Shelbee
Lizzy
Shelbee, you look spectacular! I love this look so much and having read your post, I can see why it suits you so well. I love the fact you wore combat boots on your wedding day too! Thank you so much for having me as a guest this month. Love Lizzy xxx
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Lizzy! I am so glad that you joined us this month! Your Mystic-Goth look is absolutely gorgeous!
xoxo
Shelbee
Trisha
You are looking sooo beautiful and young as well in this dress.You are doing awesome work for 40+ age women. I fully appreciate your work. Always Be Happy.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so much, Trisha! That is very kind of you to say. Always be happy, indeed! Have a wonderful week.
xoxo
Shelbee
Kellyann Rohr
You definitely enjoyed this theme Shelbee! I love the fun you are obviously having in these photos and you are a natural in Goth – definitely badass combat boots!
xo,
Kellyann
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Kellyann! But I actually was not having any fun at all during these photos! Ha. It was so cold that day that I got frost nip on my fingers. I don’t know if you can see the snowflakes in some of the photos…and I shot these photos about a week and a half ago. Winter has arrived in the North Country before we even got to experience Fall!
xoxo
Shelbee
Susan Marinelli
I was too old by the time Goth rolled around to fully enjoy it.
I will just have to enjoy it through the Fab 40’s, and you all look fabulous!
I am loving your pigtails, with your Goth, Shelbee, too cool!
And also the Mystic goth look from Lizzy.
Actually, I could do that look just by shopping my closet.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Susan, thanks so much for the wonderful compliment to us all! I had to do pigtails with the Goth look, it was just screaming for them! And Lizzy’s dress is so fantastic that I really do need it in my own closet. You could totally style something similar with your fantastic Torrid pieces, I’m sure. By the way, Torrid is having a Buy 1, Get 2 Free sale on all clearance items! Get shopping!
xoxo
Shelbee
Theresa
Damn! Totally in love with this outfit Shelbee. You have put together a fantastic elegant goth look. And the photos of the other bloggers, every one of them is fabulous.
Theresa
http://www.vintagestylefiles.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so very much, Theresa! This was definitely a fun outfit to style. And I was going to wear it all day on the day we photographed it, but it was so cold and snowing that I had to change into pants and a sweater! I feel like it was a wasted outfit. Bummer.
xoxo
Shelbee
Patrick Weseman
Wow, (all respectfully being said) as the Cure song sung “Just Like Heaven”, You are fierce and looking very hot.
I know that I am a couple of years older than you but in my old skate/punk days you could “Skate or Die” with us. Where you a Thrasher Magazine or Transworld Skating reader?
Also, I was covering the X Games as reporter for a local paper when the first 900 on a skateboard happened by your high school dreamboat Tony Hawk at the 1999 X Games Vert Best Trick competition in San Francisco. It was amazing and I got to interview him afterwards for like 30 seconds.
Have a wonderful Monday.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
That is so cool, Patrick! I didn’t really read any skater magazines, I just hung out with my skater boyfriend and his friends and thought I was so cool because I was in the “in” crowd! Ha. And you are not that much older me, are you? Like 4-5 years maybe? And thanks so much for the wonderful compliment! I blushed a little.
xoxo
Shelbee
Nancy
You know I love this! Didn t know that you also loved The Cure! I still do! But your outfit is perfection to the top! I would wear it like that any day! You all look fantastic of course.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Nancy, thanks so much! I forgot how much you love The Cure! I haven’t listened to them in years, but back in the day, I would swoon at the mere mention of Robert Smith!
xoxo
Shelbee
Molly
Those tights are something special. In fact I love your whole outfit
Molly
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Molly!
xoxo
Shelbee
Suzy Turner
Shelbee, I can’t tell you how excited I was at reading your post! I just LOVE that you are so inspired by the goth culture – and your history here just proves that I hit the nail on the head for you by choosing it as this month’s theme. And you look incredible! Although I can see your teenaged self in this outfit, it’s also somewhat grown up too.
I’m still smiling at the fact that you wanted to be hiding on The Cure’s tour bus and by a secret mistress lol!!
I’ve always been slightly more inspired by the Victorian Goth look, if that makes any sense to you? I just adore steampunk, for example!
Can’t wait to see what you have in store for us in November, Shelbee!
Huge hugs from across the pond
Suzy xx
http://www.suzyturner.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Suzy, thanks so much! I was totally excited for the Goth theme when you announced it. My only issue was deciding what to wear…as I have so many things in my closet that are suitable to the theme! I do love Victorian inspired Goth as well…actually, I love Victorian inspired anything really! And steam punk is wicked cool as well, I just never got that into wearing it, but I do love and admire others who dress in steampunk style. And November is Jennie’s turn…at least that’s what I am tracking! I should be up in December! And I am still thinking about what direction I want to take you all in. Have a fantastic day, my fabulous friend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Helen C.
I actually find you gorgeous in the goth attire! It looks nice and normal. I hate stereotypes of how people should dress and I think everyone should dress every day as they please!
As for Robert Smith..he´s still happily married after so many decades! Could he get any cuter?! 😊
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Helen, thank you so very much! I do love to change up my style on a daily basis. Sometimes Goth, sometimes rock and roll, sometimes boss lady, sometimes business, sometimes plain old mom gear! However the sartorial spirit moves me is how I will dress on any given day. And Robert Smith is totally awesome!
xoxo
Shelbee
Sheela Goh
With that coat, we’re talking about some serious dandified Goth, Shelbee!! I would wear this outfit of yours in a heartbeat. A nano heartbeat. I love that obi belt. Those fishnets. Your boots. EVERYTHING.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you so very much, dear friend! This was definitely a fun outfit to style. And the coat was all my husband’s idea. I was just trying to keep warm! It was damn cold when we shot these photos!
xoxo
Shelbee
Laura || Walking in Memphis in High Heels
I am loving your entire outfit! Those tights really make it complete!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Laura! Goth vibes definitely take me back to my style roots, for sure. And fun tights are always a must!
xoxo
Shelbee
Gail H
Wow, it’s amazing how you’ve all interpreted goth in your own way with fabulous results! The belt is superb with your outfit. I love everything about it. I never had a goth period as such but I wore an awful lot of black in my teens and 30s! Thanks for joining the #WowOnWednesday Link up!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Gail! I go through phases with black where I try to not wear it so much, but then I realize it is so my comfort zone and end up in a lot of black quite often.
xoxo
Shelbee
Daenel t.
This is so you!! I absolutely adore the plaid — so unexpected. And, ohmyword, how fun are fishnet tights? I’ve had mine for years and have only worn them twice. I love that you paired them with boots. I’m gonna see if I can incorporate that into one of my daily looks. Love it.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Daenel, thank you so much! I do love a little bit of edginess and Goth-vibes in any outfit. And fun tights are a must! I have a bunch of different fishnet tights and they are always winners when I style them. This was a super fun theme and I am looking forward to what Jennie has in mind for November!
xoxo
Shelbee
Ada
Like you I cannot fit into one or even 5 genres and styles types when it comes to defining my personal style. For sure though I was never Goth and I think I would have the hardest time wearing/doing goth. If anything my goth look would me more classic, a little sexy and edgy, slightly tame, similar to Jennie’s outfit most likely. I love love ALL of these looks though and how you each wore a different type of goth look. I love how you “defined” their different goth looks like preppy or haute. I especially love all the ways you described your own outfit and all the history you gave us on both Goth and your style beginnings and evolution. That outfit is 100% you. I love the combat boots on you. And girl those are some sassy and very bold tights. Love the cropped little plaid jacket though. It is the one classic and preppy goth item in your ensemble! But it is also very 80s and currently trendy! Aww and I bought a couple of pairs of combat boots this year. Cannot wait to wear them!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Ada, thanks so much! It is always fun to take a look back to where our style inspiration and interests began, isn’t it? I never did fit into a style box of any sort. In fact, today on the blog, my outfit is actually quite classic and preppy. I do like a good preppy look every now and then, but I probably feel most unlike myself dressed that way! And I definitely don’t think I can see you dressed in a Goth outfit! Maybe like Jennie or Mary’s outfits…a little tamer but still sexy and edgy. I hope you are having a great weekend, my friend! I am looking forward to seeing everyone’s Thanksgiving Day outfits next week.
xoxo
Shelbee
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