Keeping Perspective & Link Up On the Edge #89

April 6, 2018 / 78 Comments

I want to start out by thanking all of you so much for the wonderful comments that you shared on my post about the hacking issue. As I stated in that post, I was overwhelmed by how many people stepped forward to my aid when the problem with my website surfaced. I very much wanted to share the story with you all because there is always good to be found in issues like these. And the good that I found clearly was the willingness of so many people to help out another just for the sake of being kind. And that now leads me to the topic of keeping perspective.

*This is not a sponsored post.

While dealing with the hacking issue left me super stressed for a few days, I want to let you know that I did maintain proper perspective through it all. Yes, it did bring me to tears once at the thought of possibly losing 3 years of content, but I was still able to rationalize that if that were the worst case scenario, I would still thrive. Because, you see, I have my health, I have my home, I have my family, my friends, my security, my stability, my drive, my enthusiasm, my passion, and my happiness.  I have lost everything before and managed to rebuild myself and my life.  I have no regrets, only lessons and experiences. And perspective.

*Dress: Old Navy. No longer available.

*Boots: Karissa Boots from Shoe Dazzle.

*Blazer: Thrifted.

I could always create new and better content going forward…which was my plan anyway. So if the old content got lost forever in a technology abyss, would I really be worse off for it? Of course, it would have made me very sad. But worse off, probably not. And sadness generally dissolves back into happiness anyway. And happy is the place I choose to spend most of my hours these days.  Keeping perspective.  And a focus on happiness.

*Hat: Target.  No longer available.

*Neckerchief: Very old.

So in the midst of a crazy stressful time for me and my blog, I chose to shift my perspective onto the good things that were coming out of it. And really in the grand scheme of life is a lost website and all of its content really all that traumatic at all? I have survived much worse things in this lifetime. I am sure I will be faced with many things more that will top that. And I will choose to maintain a perspective of gratitude, kindness, love, joy, and appreciation for all of the wonderful things that I have experienced and have yet to experience. It really is quite that simple. Perspective. It is yours to control.

*Sunglasses: EyeCrave Optics.

“The only thing you sometimes have control over is perspective. You don’t have control over your situation. But you have a choice about how you view it.” -Chris Pine

“It’s not only moving that creates new starting points. Sometimes all it takes is a subtle shift in perspective, an opening of the mind, an intentional pause and reset, or a new route to start to see new options and new possibilities.” -Kristin Armstrong

“I’m just thankful for everything, all the blessings in my life, trying to stay that way. I think that’s the best way to start your day and finish your day. It keeps everything in perspective.” -Tim Tebow

“I put things in perspective and trust that everything is in its right place, be grateful that I’m healthy. Then throw on a cap and some killer red lipstick and gloss, that always seems to do the trick.” -Sasha Jackson

Now on to the featured favorites from last week.

Dawn Lucy of Fashion Should Be Fun shared her post, Jambu’s Rio – Super Comfortable Wedges. She has created such a great classic look for everyday with this adorable outfit and super comfortable and stylish wedge sandals.

Dawn Lucy of Fashion Should Be Fun

Maria of Passion Fruit, Paws and Peonies shared her post, Practical tips for your daughter’s wedding morning. After recently celebrating this special day with her daughter, Maria shared some great tips that she learned from the entire experience that are beneficial to any mother-of-the bride.

Maria of Passion Fruit, Paws and Peonies

Cheryl of Northwest Mountain Living shared her post, The Color of Lavender & Style Wise Link Up. She is a vision of Spring in this gorgeous color palette with those amazing lavender heels and my favorite, her tulip hem jeans.

Cheryl of Northwest Mountain Living


How do you maintain perspective to survive the daily challenges of life?  It could be something as simple as throwing on some killer red lipstick!

Keeping it on the edge,

Shelbee

Linking up with these Fabulous Link Ups.

I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.

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78 Comments

  • Maria | passion fruit, paws and peonies

    April 6, 2018 at 8:19 am Reply

    Shelbee – first of all thank you thank you for being so supportive of my daughter’s wedding morning post. It means so much to me. Secondly, I love your dress! It’s a cut I would wear and I love how you’ve styled it. Finally, your words on perspective is very valid to me right now. I have recently been told I need an operation to potentially save my sight. It’s scary to feel I may be a burden to my family. But, if worse comes to worse and my sight does go, I wouldn’t be in constant pain like some conditions people have. I have a loving and supportive family. I will adapt, I will survive. But perspective is hard to keep hold of constantly. So, I swing from ‘this is terrible’ to ‘nothings actually happened yet’. But perspective is still the aim xxx

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 9:13 am Reply

      Oh wow, Maria, I am so sorry to hear this. That is very scary and I totally understand how your perspective would change day to day as you learn about what procedure you will need. Perspective can certainly be very difficult to keep hold of in situations like that. But I am so glad to hear that you are aiming for a new perspective. And it was my pleasure to share your post. I think so many will find it helpful. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers as you figure out if you need surgery, etc.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Samantha

    April 6, 2018 at 9:56 am Reply

    Hi Shelbee!
    A great post… and a fabulous dress.
    Keeping perspective is so important.
    I remind myself how lucky I am every day and how things can change in a heartbeat.
    I haven’t mentioned this anywhere else but my husband almost died this time last year. He ended up having 9 units of blood. It was a difficult time for us all. Us mums tend to have to hold everything together, don’t we?
    What happened last year puts smaller problems into perspective.
    Nothing else seems that much of a big deal, or worth getting upset about.
    If I’m having a bit of a wobble, a bold outfit and a bright lip give me the boost I need to “Suck it up” and keep marching forward.
    XXX
    Samantha

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 10:25 am Reply

      Oh wow, Samantha, thank you so much for sharing your story here. An event like that with your husband definitely gives you a new and different perspective, for sure. And I think for people who have dealt with a lot of loss or have been seriously threatened with that kind of tragic loss definitely change their perspective. We moms and wives for sure carry a huge load in holding it all together. Being an Army for me as shown me just how strong and responsible I am…another great eye opener for perspective. I am so glad that your husband is okay and you probably live your lives so differently now with that behind you…valuing all the little beautiful wonderful things that you have! I need some bold red lipstick today!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Deborah Stinedurf

    April 6, 2018 at 10:02 am Reply

    Perspective is everything, you are so right. Literally as I write this, I’m going through some sh*t at work. You know how I’ve always loved my job, but there’s a shift in how things are run and I am straight up miserable. I actually burst into tears at the end of the day yesterday. It’s put me in a dark place, but as always I’m working on digging my way out and figuring out how to work around it. When I’m like this I usually allow a few days of wallowing and then I kick my own a$$, change my perspective and get on with life. No doubt I’ll be writing about it soon and I’ll link to your post. xo
    Debbie
    http://www.fashionfairydust.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 10:15 am Reply

      Debbie, thanks for reading. I am so sorry to hear that you are struggling with work bs. Workplace issues are never not miserable…which is why I totally prefer running my own business at this point. I only have to deal with myself and all of you fabulous blogging friends. But I think I do know you well enough at this point to know that you will gain perspective very quickly and then you will share a valuable message with all of us. And while keeping a good perspective is important, it is also important to acknowledge our feelings and give ourselves time to process them…so you go right ahead and wallow in your misery for a few days…we both know you will come out on top in the end!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Nancy Baten

    April 6, 2018 at 11:18 am Reply

    I am glad that everything is solved and that you always be able to look at the bright side of things! You look absolute stunning in that outfit! And hats suit you so very well! have a great weekend.

  • Lazy Daisy Jones

    April 6, 2018 at 12:42 pm Reply

    Hi again Shelbee, you are right perspective is everything in this life and however hard it is I will always try to see the silver lining inside the cloud!
    another post with some very wise words, thank you!
    I am now off to see and read Marias daughters wedding post it looks sooo romantic
    have a great week
    Ashley x

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 3:07 pm Reply

      Ashley, thanks so much for reading. So far in my life there has been a silver lining to everything. It’s weird, I was just talking to a friend today about losing both of my parents at young ages. And while it was absolutely horrible while I was going through it, I am actually really grateful that I don’t ever have to go through that again. I did it. I suffered the loss. I survived. I thrived. And knowing that no one gets out of this life alive reassures me of the inevitability of it all and now I know I can survive most things with a positive perspective. I hope you enjoy Maria’s post and have a wonderful weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Suzanne Smith

    April 6, 2018 at 1:00 pm Reply

    I agree with everything you said in this post! If we can focus on the things that are going well, we really don’t have time to think about the rest! You made my day…I will carry your words with me today, as I really needed to hear them! Thanks so much!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 3:04 pm Reply

      Suzanne, I am so glad that I could make your day! I need to get some perspective today myself as my head is floating all over the place right now! Thanks for stopping by and have a magnificent weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Cheryl Tucker

    April 6, 2018 at 1:27 pm Reply

    First of all I love your outfit! Those boots are so fabulous! Second, I admire your perspective throughout your hacking ordeal. I have sometimes thought about what I would do if I lost my blog as it has become a journal for me in some respects. But like you I always remind myself it is just a thing and won’t change me going forward. Lastly, thanks so much for the shout out today! Happy Friday beautiful lady!
    Cheryl
    http://www.northwestmountainliving.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 3:02 pm Reply

      Cheryl, thank you so much! My blog is like a journal as well and the thought of losing it all is hard to take. But I am so glad you drew that parallel to journaling because it stirred up this memory…Many years ago in my early twenties, my soon to be husband (who is now my ex-husband) had read some of my journals from high school. He was displeased with some of what he read and threatened that perhaps we should not get married because of things I had written when I was 14. Being young and dumb and scared, I burned every journal that I have ever written…and there were a lot…boxes full. I thought I was doing the right thing. And I regretted it after we were divorced. And now I have this rule…that if anyone snoops in my private stuff without my permission, not only do they deserve to read possibly unsavory things, but they do not deserve to be part of my life. There are boxes of journals stashed in my basement that I had written after I was divorced…and my husband knows that without permission, they are off limits and that it is a serious deal-breaker for me even 10 years and 2 kids into the relationship! But now here I am, journaling in a sense and sharing it with the world to see! Happy Friday to you as well, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • jodie filogomo

    April 6, 2018 at 1:39 pm Reply

    Truly you have the best head on your shoulders, Shelbee. Because it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Maybe not what you wanted to happen if you lost all that, but……
    I’ve been trying so hard to keep this in mind when the little things happen. I think it’s the advantage of getting older—that wisdom thing!!
    Have a fantastic weekend, my brilliant friend!!
    XOXO
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 6, 2018 at 2:55 pm Reply

      Jodie, thank you so much! I try to keep this head as straight as I can, but sometimes it does get a bit off track and goes spinning out of my control! But I am thankful that I have found ways to reel it back in and gain perspective before any damage is done. This wisdom thing is a really amazing thing! Have a marvelous weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Cheryl Shops

    April 6, 2018 at 5:04 pm Reply

    I’m glad things are back on track for you, post-hacking! It’s funny, too, you hear these things about how bloggers are so competitive with each other, but I’ve found the opposite, that everyone is very supportive—and I think that shows by the love everyone sent you during your ordeal! We’re all in it together. 🙂 Also, I love your vertical stripes—I am totally in the market for a dress like that! Thank you for stopping by my linkup too!
    Cheryl Shops | http://www.cherylshops.net

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 11:03 am Reply

      Cheryl, thanks so much! I agree with you completely, I have not encountered a blogger yet who was not helpful and friendly and supportive and empowering. I have heard stories of blogger competitiveness as well, but I think they maybe exist in a completely different niche of blogs than we have immersed ourselves in. Our community of bloggers is simply the most amazing group of people I have ever had the pleasure of working with! I hope you have a wonderful weekend, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 11:00 am Reply

      Katie, thank you so much! Don’t get me wrong, I would have been wrecked for at least a few days if I had lost everything. But then perspective would have shifted back in to place after the initial blow had been properly processed! I wish you a fabulous weekend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 10:58 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Lorena! It is just an outside wall on a closed down bar in my town and I have been wanting to do photos there for a while. I am really happy with the way they turned out, too! Have a wonderful weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Lisa Richardson

    April 6, 2018 at 9:23 pm Reply

    I think this outfit has a retro-chic vibe and you rock it. You are right about perspective and it’s easiest to lose it when you are sleep deprived. Have a great weekend! XO

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 10:55 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Lisa! I am totally sleep deprived right now! Ha. But I agree…and I think we all lose perspective at times, that’s just part of life. But then we need to switch it back around once we have gotten proper rest! It’s a very strange phenomenon how our minds get cloudy then clear again…over and over again throughout this entire journey of life! I hope you have a wonderful and restful weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Stylecrone

    April 6, 2018 at 10:19 pm Reply

    Our view on life’s happenings makes all the difference and you did wonderfully keeping your perspective. The pom-pom on your hat is such a playful fun touch, and what a great match for the trim on your boots. Thank you for sharing your fun style with Hat Attack!

  • Maureen

    April 7, 2018 at 3:06 am Reply

    I agree with you. Being able to look at a certain situation and turn it around is so important. Who we become isn’t all about the good things that happen to us but also the bad. We grow from our experiences and by looking at our situation with a different lens we can decide the outcome. I love your outfit! The shirt dress is such a classic and timeless piece and your boots rock! Love the faux fur and buckle detail.

    Maureen | http://www.littlemisscasual.com

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 10:49 am Reply

      Maureen, thank you so much for sharing your perspective on perspective! We are definitely a compilation of all of our experiences, the good and bad ones. And it is the bad ones that build our strength and perseverance and make us stronger, better people. I hope you have a wonderful weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Terri Gardner

    April 7, 2018 at 4:01 am Reply

    I love all black and white! I just wanted to drop by and thank you for linking up to 2nd Loved 1st Friday and doing your bit to support slow fashion. Keeping things in perspective is an important thing. Last year, my drive crashed and my tech guy couldn’t recover anything and i didn’t back up files like I should of. I lost a lot, but totally survived. It was a hard lesson, but compared to other stuff that can happen in life, now it was just small potatoes.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 10:42 am Reply

      Terri, thank you so much for your kind compliment and for sharing your life lesson on perspective with me. I never back up anything because I can never figure out how to do it properly…and that seriously bites me so many times. But then again I just keep surviving and thriving! I hope you have a wonderful weekend…free from all technology glitches!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Ada

    April 7, 2018 at 5:02 am Reply

    I am so glad you wrote this post and so beautifully too. I can relate and resonate with a lot of those sentences. Did you read my mind?! Especially with (as you know) what I have been going through the last year or so. I loved those quotes too. Perspective is everything and I believe you would have survived too and thrived even, despite the loss of a website. So nice that so many people were kind and helpful, though. They paid it forward.

    Love how you styled that little striped shirtdress. It is black and white and instant chic! Muuuuaaaaazzzz.

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 7, 2018 at 10:34 am Reply

      Ada, you and I definitely think alike on a lot of topics from life to fashion and all things in between..which why we are friends. Thanks so much for reading and relating and validating what I do! I hope your weekend is amazing!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Amy Christensen

    April 7, 2018 at 4:48 pm Reply

    Perspective is really what it comes down to. We can focus on the bad, or we can be thankful and focus on all the good…a warm bed, a roof over our heads, a working car, our spouses, children, grandchildren, friends, family and our faith are all good things we can remember when going through difficulty. Hope you are having a great weekend! – Amy
    http://stylingrannymama.com/

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 8, 2018 at 10:22 am Reply

      Amy, thanks so much for reading and for sharing your perspective. I was just talking yesterday with some new business connections about perspective in business…and I said that even when I fail in business pursuits and fall on my face, at least I fell and failed forward! Learned and used it as a stepping stone. So our perspective on all things is really so important and can lead us in the right direction if we allow it to. I hope you are having a fabulous weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Chrissy

    April 7, 2018 at 8:00 pm Reply

    Shelbee, this outfit is so fun. You know I love hats and you’re sporting this one fabulously. I like how you paired it with the dress and those pretty boots. And the scarf is an added bonus. Beautiful as always – great perspective and attitude!!

  • Rania Abdulla

    April 8, 2018 at 3:03 am Reply

    I’ve had a similar situation where my website went offline and the entire site was gone, irretrievable unless I paid $200 to get the trashed backup from my old hosting provider. Needless to say I paid it and left the new hosting provider that I had initially left because I wasn’t happy with but sadly had to run back to like a little kid to their parents. More recently, I’ve had all pictures disappear off my phone that I used for blog and social media. It took a day on the phone with Apple to get them back…Technology isn’t always gonna back us up when we need it lol…

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 8, 2018 at 10:08 am Reply

      Oh my goodness, Rania, that is awful! I have lost all of my blog pictures before when my entire computer died and it couldn’t be recovered nor could anything on it. Just completely gone. It can be so frustrating. I am so glad you were able to get all of your things recovered. Thanks for reading! Have a wonderful weekend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Gigi Kiersten

    April 9, 2018 at 3:20 pm Reply

    I love your outfit Shelbee, it’s just so cute and feminine! Also, I think the stripes really add a feminine flair. However my favorite parts of this outfit is definitely the boots and hat! I love them so much, and honestly this post makes wish that I can wear heels like that again!

  • anne the spygirl

    April 9, 2018 at 7:28 pm Reply

    Great post, and GLAD you didn’t lose all your content. NOW BACK IT UP!!!!!
    Because it is VERY VERY amusing to go back and look at ones “vintage” posts.
    (No, we don’t look and laugh at our friends’ vintage posts. Because we are kind. But my own 2011 poses? OMG!).

    xxox

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 10, 2018 at 11:26 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Anne! I can never figure out how to back this sh*t up! What is wrong with me?! And so funny you mention vintage posts…I was just scrolling through my IG last night and dying over some of my posts on there! I have looked back on old blog posts and while the content doesn’t appall me so much, the photos…oh dear! What was I thinking? I can’t believe I put some of that out there publicly! And you can laugh at my vintage posts if you want…because there is nobody on this planet who laughs at me more than myself!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Marie Moody

    April 11, 2018 at 7:27 pm Reply

    For me… I LOVE THE BOOTS! They’re so cool! Thanks for sharing all the photos… I wish I was that comfortable in front of a camera. I use to be, but since I got older me and the camera just don’t like each other! Great job & thanks for sharing! Have a great day!

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 12, 2018 at 10:21 am Reply

      Thanks so much, Marie! I used to hate having my picture taken and would hide from cameras at any photo taking event. I am still not all that comfortable, but the more I do, the more comfortable I do become. You learn the most flattering angle after a while and you also learn how to really laugh at yourself in the process, too! I wish you a wonderful day, my friend!

      xoxo
      Shelbee

  • Marilee Gramith

    April 13, 2018 at 4:49 am Reply

    There is just something crisp and snappy about black and white stripes. The hat adds an additional dimension of sophistication.
    Perspective is a process and probably never reaches 20/ 20 .

    • shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com

      April 13, 2018 at 10:37 am Reply

      I agree, Jude! Black and white stripes always catch my attention! And perspective is certainly a process as it seems to change with every move. Thanks so much for stopping by and have a great weekend, my friend.

      xoxo
      Shelbee

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Shelbee on the Edge