6 Ways to Feel More Comfortable About the Way You Look
Do you ever struggle with self confidence? The older I get, the more I realize that self confidence is an fickle emotion that tends to come and go in waves for all of us. We may feel confidence in the way we look on Monday, only to feel awful about ourselves by Wednesday, returning to a place of self confidence on Friday. Repeat that cycle a million times and you have my life in a nutshell. But I am certain that I am not alone in this capricious cycle of self confidence.
With a focus on the now, I think today is the perfect day for all of us to be at peace with who we are and how we look. When you glance at your reflection in the mirror, you should respond with a big, beautiful smile that shines as bright as the amazing person you are. Now is the time to hold your head high and strut your way through life knowing that you are stunning and amazing.
We all have insecurities. We all have things about ourselves that we would like to change. For example, wearing glasses may be one of your biggest insecurities and you may seek the services of a laser eye melbourne clinic in order to discuss other options. We all notice things about others that we wish we could acquire. But these things will not make us happy and confident. All it takes is a bit of self acceptance and gratitude to love yourself and become everything you were meant to be.
Below are six easy tips to gain more confidence in your appearance and yourself.
1. Ignore Messages from the Media
The media, especially social media, presents us with subjective ideals about how we should look which can lead to self esteem issues when we fall short of these media standards for beauty. Body shaming is still a real problem in the world and even more so in online social platforms. With the constant bombardment of unrealistic beauty standards, it is no wonder that many women (and men) struggle with issues of self confidence in the way we look.
Now is the perfect time to shift our focus away from the arbitrary standards dictated by the fickle and sometimes cruel fashion world and concentrate on ourselves and what makes us feel beautiful and confident. We cannot control the way others perceive us, but we can certainly control the way we perceive ourselves. And shouldn’t we be viewing ourselves in the best light possible?
2. Buy What You Love
As the fashion world constantly barrages us with new trends and new styles, it is important to not fall blindly into the trend trap. Not all fashion trends work for every body. If a certain trend does not work for you, it is okay to pass on it and appreciate it on others who can wear the look more effectively.
If you try a new trend and it doesn’t make you light up when you look in the mirror, leave it behind. There are an endless amount of trends and styles that we can all find a few that work best for us. Focus on the trends that make your heart happy and your eyes smile and you will quickly find your way to a personal style that lets the world know exactly who you are…a beautiful and confident human being.
As you develop your own personal style, you may also find that it will change year to year and even season to season. As long as you are not blindly following trends and purchasing only pieces that you absolutely love, you will always remain true to your own unique style.
It is also important to know your body, its size, and its shape, and the silhouettes that make you most comfortable in your clothing. For example, if you are curvy, you want clothing and undergarments that fit properly and comfortably like plus size bras, pants, dresses, and tops. Also, never underestimate the power of properly fitted undergarments. They really do have a powerful impact in the way that your clothing fits you.
3. Minimize Stress in Your Life
Life can be a stressful endeavor which can eventually start to manifest in your physical appearance. Of course, there are many stressful situations in life that we cannot avoid and you will start to notice the effects of that kind of anxiety in your face. Consistent stress and anxiety can make you look tired and lose your effervescent glow. Try to implement stress-reducing strategies into your life to help maintain your healthy glow and remember to keep on smiling. A smile is a much better accessory to wear than a frown.
4. Smile Big and Smile Often
Smiles are contagious. And smiles are much more attractive than scowls and frowns. When you smile, you eyes glow brighter and your entire facial structure is lifted to allow for maximum glow. Naturally, when we glow we appear prettier to the outside world. It is an easy way to shift your mood as well as the mood of those around you.
Smiling also aids in changing your perception to a more positive angle. Unfortunately, for some, smiling actually brings with it facial pain which may discourage people from smiling. If you find smiling painful or notice things like your jaw clicking when it opens and closes, you may wish to search for something like “TMJ dentists near me” to see if they might be able to help treat the problem and get you feeling confident when smiling once again .
5. Spend Less Time in Front of the Mirror
Of course, mirrors are our friends when we are applying make up, styling our hair, or putting together our outfits. But focusing too much on ourselves in the mirror can have a detrimental effect. We should not be using our mirrors to constantly identify our flaws. Rather, our mirrors should be instruments for self empowerment and self esteem. Trust in your own beauty, both internal and external, and focus on your best attributes. Use the mirror only as a safeguard to ensure that you are not walking around with spinach in your teeth.
“Confidence is the most beautiful thing you can possess.”
Sabrina Carpenter
6. Maintain Your Health and Fitness
All bodies are built differently and capable of different things. Rather than being hyper focused on how your body compares to others, shift your focus instead to caring for the amazing body that you do have. Health and fitness are hugely important for not only maintaining good health, but also for improving self confidence. When we realize all that our bodies are capable of doing, it helps us to respect and love our bodies more.
Find physical activities and exercises that you enjoy doing as well. Then you are combining fun with self care and there’s nothing better for our self confidence than that.
The Bottom Line
Our relationships with ourselves are obviously lifelong ones. And like any relationship, our feelings about ourselves will be subject to shifting and changing all throughout our lives. Some days we will feel so confident that we can take on the world, while other days we may find ourselves hiding our faces from the world in some weird episode of self shame. But it is important to know how to navigate through all the ups and downs in self confidence. Just keep a positive focus on your natural self and take it slowly as you venture into the world of beauty essentials and finding your way to a more confident existence.
How do you manage the periodic shifts in your self confidence?
Keeping it on the edge,
Shelbee
Linking up with these Fabulous Link Parties.
Outfit Details: Tee Shirt, Cardigan, and Hair Tie-Torrid / Pants-Nine West / Shoes-Target / Earrings and Necklace-c/o Happiness Boutique / Hat-Thrifted
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
I am a midlife woman, wife, and stay-at-home mother of 2 boys and 2 cats. I have a passion for helping other women feel fabulous in the midst of this crazy, beautiful life.
26 Comments
Ellie
Love this monochromatic look on you! Great pictures and great post!
I know I will never be a “trendy” person, but sticking with what I know I love on me makes me personally more confident. Maybe the reason why in our younger years we’re less confident is because we try following the trends too much. And you are so right, not every trend is for every body! Fun to try different trends of course, and sometimes we might be surprised and actually like a trend!
Hope you’re having a good weekend! Looks like a sunny day over here, but chilly!!
Ellie
Ellibelle’s Corner
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Ellie, thanks so much for this insightful comment. I have always been obsessed with fashion for as long as I can remember but I have always loved taking the trends and making them unique to me. It is fun to try out the ones that appeal to us to see if something new can be added to our repertoire! I think you are so right that we grow in confidence as we get older and have a much better grasp on what personal style means to each of us. I appreciate all the different styles that people wear and enjoy. It keeps life interesting! It is a very rainy and dreary weekend here so I am just chilling in my loungewear while I catch up on some blog reading! I hope you are having a lovely weekend as well.
xoxo
Shelbee
Nancy
Nice post! And very true!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Nancy! I hope you are having a wonderful weekend!
xoxo
Shelbee
Laura Bambrick
Do I ever struggle with self-confidence!? Ha! Almost everyday! It’s something I always struggle with and have for most of my life. Great tips to help you feel more self-confidence!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Laura, thanks so much! I definitely go in cycles with my self confidence. Some days I have enough to take on the world. But most days I do not and hide away instead! Happy Mother’s Day to you, my friend! I hope you have a wonderful day!
xoxo
Shelbee
Lisa DeArmas
These are such amazing words of wisdom!!! Everyone young and old needs to hear them!! Your positive energy and vibe shines and I love it!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Lisa, thank you so much for such a kind comment! We can all use reminders like this every now and the, myself included! I hope you are having a wonderful weekend1
xoxo
Shelbee
Michelle
I think my shifts in self-confidence are directly tied to my energy levels. So I’ve learned to recognize the shift for what it is – not having the energy to deal with anyone. This has helped me tremendously. Also I have surrounded myself with people who love me unconditionally. And honestly, I don’t give a rats about what anyone outside those people thinks. (I was pretty much born that way, but I’ve gotten even better at it with age. 😜)
Really cute outfit! I especially like the hat.
Michelle
https://mybijoulifeonline.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, thanks so much, Michelle! I have definitely gotten better with age when it comes to not giving a rat’s ass what other people think! And surrounding ourselves with unconditional love is definitely the best way to survive this crazy life! I am curious now about my own energy levels and how they relate to my self confidence. I am going to need to pay closer attention! It could be just exhaustion and not lack of self confidence that gets the best of me sometimes. I hope you are having a wonderful weekend, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Kathrine Eldridge
Yes to all this advice Shelbee! As I turn 50, I am more and more focusing on self care and love and less on what the world wants of me. Love this graphic tee!
https://www.kathrineeldridge.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Kathrine! I am with you on that! The older I get the less I care what the world thinks and the more I care about can I sleep at night satisfied with the person I am! I hope you are having a lovely weekend and a very Happy Mother’s Day!
xoxo
Shelbee
saTanja
Confidence is the key. When I feel happy and pumped I could feel like the top of the world in the randomest clothes while having a bad day, there’s no styling or outfit that could make me feel looking good.
LackaDaisy
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
saTanja, thanks so much for reading and sharing about your self confidence. Lately mine seems to follow my monthly cycles and you are right, on the bad days when confidence is lacking, it doesn’t matter what I put on my body. I will still feel crummy all day long. But the same is true when my confidence is high, it doesn’t matter what I wear, I will feel fantastic regardless! I hope you have a wonderful week, my friend.
xoxo
Shelbee
Patrick Weseman
Such great tips and we really need to ignore the media or noise as I call it.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks, Patrick! We definitely need to avoid and ignore all that media noise! It just keeps getting louder and louder though, doesn’t it?
xoxo
Shelbee
Jennifer
These are all great tips! There are times where I don’t feel great about the way I look and these tips are helpful.
Jennifer
Curated By Jennifer
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thanks so much, Jennifer! I feel like we all can use these gentle reminders for boosting self confidence sometimes. Have a great week!
xoxo
Shelbee
Amy Johnson
Such a great post, and fabulous tips. I never use to struggle with this until recently when I felt I was starting to look older. I just got rid of a few things I thought I shouldn’t be wearing anymore. I felt like a hypocrite because I truly don’t believe in “age appropriate dressing” but I just didn’t feel comfortable wearing those things anymore. You have such a great sense of style. I just love this outfit.
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Amy, thanks so much for this lovely comment! I go through phases with certain styles of clothing when they suddenly just don’t feel like me. I don’t even attribute that feeling to age appropriateness. That’s not a thing I pay much heed to either. But there are certain things that maybe our personalities just outgrow and that’s okay, too! I love that we can continue getting creative with our personal style no matter how old we are!
xoxo
Shelbee
mireille
You look absolutely adorable in this outfit! Love the newsboy cap. My mom gave me one this winter and haven’t worn it yet. I have definitely become more confident with the way I look the past 10 years and I am trying to work on getting healthier: I am even washing and moisturizing my face everyday now (for more than a week in a row lol). I am also moving more.
http://www.chezmireillefashiontravelmom.com
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Aw, thanks, Mireille! I have a few newsboy caps and I really like them with certain outfits. I bet yours looks super cute on you, too! I can totally picture that style of hat on you. I have been on a super healthy journey this year but have fallen off in recent weeks. I absolutely have to get back to it because it really does effect my levels of self confidence. I feel better when I am living a healthier lifestyle! I love that you are making those little changes, too. Self care is so important!
xoxo
Shelbee
Sheila (of Ephemera)
This outfit feels very “you”, Shelbee – I love the cap and the tee knotted at your waist.
I’ve found I have way more confidence now in my 50s than I’ve ever had in my life. Part of that is “giving less f**ks” and to be honest, part of it is that I have taken so many pictures of myself for my blog over the past 13 years, that I’ve become much more objective about my appearance. When I look at my pictures, yes, I still look at the stomach rolls or the bra fat or the thickness in my legs (all have been triggers for downward “death spirals” for my moods and confidence in the past), but mostly I’m just checking to make sure the clothes look good. I definitely zero in less on my perceived flaws – it’s more about the “checking for spinach” (love that line).
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Thank you, Sheila! I am definitely way more confident at this age than I ever was in my life. Can you imagine if we all had the same level confidence in our 20’s that we do in midlife? What a different life experience that would have been! Until I started blogging, I would not allow anyone to take my picture because I absolutely despised my image in photographs. Blogging has definitely helped me with that! Talking about pushing outside my comfort zone. Now I feel like I spend all my time taking and editing photos of myself. You definitely do become more objective about yourself doing that! Just check for spinach and leave the rest to fate! Haha.
xoxo
Shelbee
Lauren Renee Sparks
This spoke to so many of my issues. Spend less time in front of the mirror is so good. Have you heard about the rise in plastic surgery since the pandemic? So many people have been forced to look at themselves on zoom all the time instead of just getting ready for the day and forgetting it. We have all been scrutinizing ourselves on the screen and thought we come up lacking. I have no judgement for those who have the means and want to change a little something to increase their confidence, but all the better if we can be truly content with how God made us!
shelbeeontheedge@gmail.com
Oh wow, Lauren, thank you for this comment. I did not hear of the rise in cosmetic surgery and that just made me kind of sad. I agree with you though, if that’s your thing and you have the means to do it, I am not going to judge. But it is so important to love ourselves in the beautiful way that we were created! I hope you are having a wonderful weekend!
xoxo
Shelbee